Football Rules

I need some clarity on the philosophy of certain football rules that I noticed in the Colts/Pats game last night:

Rule 1: Number of players allowed to break the huddle/be in the huddle. As I understand it, having 12 players in the huddle is a no-no. Why? Isn't there already a rule in place for "too many players on the field" when the ball is snapped? Isn't that redundancy? Who cares how many players are in the huddle? I thought all that mattered was how many you had when the ball was snapped. Is it supposed to make the referee's life easier at counting players? I.e, if 3 players run on the field, then all you have to watch for is 3 to come off. Instead of always counting 11. But, I'm sure they still always count for 11 because many times after a running back gets a big play or wide receiver makes a good catch, they run out of bounds and many times take the next play off. Probably because it's a new down, and new formation package...and they weren't needed. Anyway, back to the original question. Is the rule for the defense so they know what players have entered the game so they know what kind of defense to set up or be prepared for? Are they watching if 4 players come into the huddle and 3 of them are WR's and then notice that all 3 left and so now they have to think it's going to be a run play? I don't get it.

Rule 2: Face guarding. Last night there was a pass interference penalty against the Pats for "face guarding" the WR because the defensive player didn't make a play on the ball. Keep in mind, he never touched the WR! Instead, he watched the eyes and body language of the WR and knew the ball was probably coming his direction, so he better put his arms up to knock it away. In my opinion, I would think you should be allowed to do whatever you need to do possible to not let the WR catch the ball, as long as you don't touch him. Think of it this way, if the Defense would rather play defense in the NFL by just watching the eyes of the WR without looking for the ball, then I'd say that is to the Offense's ADVANTAGE. You'll give up a lot of touchdowns if you want to rely on hoping the ball runs into your ape-like waving arms or your huge dome of a helmet.

Try to picture this: What if the defensive player was making a play on the ball and turned around to deflect it. However, what if he missed the ball completely but the action of his arms attempting to deflect the ball temporarily shielded the WR's eyes and he lost concentration on the ball and failed to catch it. What is the difference? Because the defensive player temporarily blocked the WR's vision, that is a slight form of face guarding. I just think the defense should be allowed to do whatever it takes. If he wants to stand on his hands and use his feet, that's his prerogative. It's called LUCK.

Colts Win

I'm so glad the Colts won the AFC Championship. I'm pretty sure a Patriots-Bears Super Bowl would have the lowest rated in NFL history.

Save the Sharks

Sharks have an image problem. The mulitple rows of teeth and the eating people have made them look bad. But, "They're not all just teeth," says Sonja Fordham, policy director of the Shark Alliance. They're just misunderstood and some conservationists are looking to rehabilitate the image of the shark. You see, they ONLY killed 7 people for sure, maybe two more. Advocates estimate there are about 100 million sharks or shark-like fish killed each year and point out that's only 1 human for every 10 million sharks. I'll admit that's a pretty shocking statistic. We must need to kill more sharks since they're obviously not getting the message. Come on, we kill 10 million for every person and they keep attacking? I think what we have here is a failure to communicate.

Hatable

Bill Simmons of ESPN, a Patriots fan, finds himself asking a terrible question in this article: Wait a second ... am I rooting for the football version of the Yankees? He goes on to explore the question and of course finds that, while some the hatred is earned, a large part of it has to do with the current 24-hour sports world. It's a good read from a great writer, but I don't think he's 100% right.

I've often asked myself why I dislike the Patriots so much. As Simmons points out, they don't buy wins like the Yankees have been known to, they're free of T.O.-type players, and they do the little things right to win. I ought to love the team. But I really, really don't. Like many things in football, it's starts with the QB. Brady went to Michigan, which I can (mostly) forgive, but it's still a strike. There's probably a bit of jealousy involved as well since there have been QBs at MSU that I've rooted for that were better college QBs but haven't had anywhere near the amazing success Brady has enjoyed. Plus, he's a pretty boy who dates movie stars. I'd rather hang with Peyton Manning any day. That said, I like Brady more than I used to. I mean, he did have his O-line in a commercial with him.

I don't think you can discount the effect of all the media attention either. Simmons says you can shut it off and just watch the game on Sunday, but it's not quite that easy. If you're going to follow football you have to see some of it, and you can't escape it during the telecast either. You can only hear so many superlatives about Belichick, Brady, and the rest before your ears start to bleed. And I'm sorry, but no one who dresses in a hobo-style hoodie can actually be a genius.

There's other things, but I'll make one final comment. Simmons says that because Patriots fans endured four decades of "futility and embarassment" that "we earned this." Pffft. Unless you've followed the Lions your entire life, don't you dare try and play the "futility and embarassment" card because you don't really know what those words mean.

UPDATE: As I'm watching the game I'm reminded of another annoying thing about the Patriots: they always get lucky. Going into the endzone the RB fumbles the ball and a Colts player looks like he has it, but it squirts out and is recovered for a Patriots TD. So often, they don't look like the better team, or even a great team, just a team that enjoys everything going their way. That's frustrating.

Kryptonite

I had forgotten how much I enjoyed the music of Three Doors Down. Nothing new, just thought I'd mention it.

Compare and Contrast

Yes, I must be really bored.

Lethal Weapon 27 was on last night. Well, part 2. I've been thinking about this for awhile now and last night just reminded me. I'm going to take two blockbuster movies and show how much they parallel. Maybe you've noticed the same things. The movies are "Lethal Weapon" and "Die Hard."

1) The movies were released in the US somewhat close to each other as blockbuster action movies. LW in March of '87. DH in July of '88.

2) Both had major action roles played by white guys fairly new on the Hollywood scene. Gibson was known for "Mad Max" but Willis was "famous" for "Blind Date."

3) Both white characters had African-American sidekicks. Gibson/Glover. Willis/Sgt. Al Powell (Carl Winslow as most of you know him). Side note: His real name is Reginald VelJohnson and is the textbook definition of "type cast." I think more often than not his character is a police officer.

4) Both main characters in both movies are police officers.

5) Both have a Christmas time theme.

6) Both give Joel Silver a credit as one of the Producers.

7) Both give Original Music credit to Michael Kamen. LW also added Eric Clapton.

8) Both "tough guys" playing "bad guy" roles were blond. Busey in LW and "Karl" in DH.

9) Both have the classic fight scene near the end of the movie between the hero and tough guy. Gibson v Busey in LW and Willis v "Karl" in DH.

10) Both have the stereotypical Hollywood ending where the "tough guy" is still alive at the end of the movie after everyone thought they were dead. Busy in LW and "Karl" in DH.

I think that's all I could remember. There may be more.


Stayed tuned for my next movie parallelism between "Escape from Alcatraz" and "The Shawshank Redemption."

All (Sports) Stars

Keeping on track with Adam's last post, I have my own question:

Which guys who are stars in their own sport, could be stars in just about anything they would try. Or, if you had to create an ultimate decathlon sports team, which athletes would you want? Obviously you want athleticism, but the reoccuring theme is probably going to be brains. Guys that would be mentally tough and possibly bad mothers no one wants to mess with.

For example, Derek Jeter would probably be a stud at underwater basketweaving.

So, here are the guys I'd want on my team (of course I can't remember EVERY athlete to pick from) if I had to go to war with them on the field, diamond, course, court, euchre, RISK, spelling bees, ice, water, etc.

1) Roger Clemens
2) Derek Jeter
3) Tom Brady
4) Michael Jordan
5) Tiger Woods
6)

First Love

Jeff Samardzija has taken the first step towards becoming the next Drew Henson. Err, I guess that wasn't exactly a compliment, was it? Anyway, Samardzija has agreed to a $10 million, five-year deal with the Chicago Cubs. Said Samardzija: "Baseball is my first love. I played it my whole life." He has no plans to return to football.

So, I've got a question. How many athletes who are considered serious prospects at both football and baseball choose the right sport? If you're considering money it would seem football is the way to go, but baseball is probably safer, unless you get hit in the face with a 90+ mph fastball. Henson managed to wash out of both sports. Kirk Gibson was an All-American WR at MSU, but it's hard to imagine that he would have had a better career in football, or an achievement like his homerun in the '88 World Series. Deion Sanders played both sports well but didn't make a real impact in baseball. Any others?

UPDATE: Ump's comment is too good and long to leave in the comments section, so I'm reproducing it here:

ump said:
Jordan had mental issues with his mid-life crisis. His father was murdered and that screwed him up a little, but I can't blame him for that. So, we can't really talk about him, also because I think I could have suited up in the Minors and struck out less times than him. I could at least have bunted one of those three strikes.

Bo: He, like Deion, didn't make as much of an impact in baseball. But, I still saw some impressive stuff: Running up the outfield fence after catching a fly ball on the run because he couldn't stop his momentum so he just ran up the wall. Or, the time the umpire wouldn't grant him a timeout while he held his right hand up but kept his left on the handle as the pitch was coming. Needless to say, the pitch traveled 400 feet the other direction.

Donovan McNabb: Basketball would have probably led to easier injuries to rehab, but I doubt he would have been a starter.

Charlie Ward: Won the heisman, but maybe he could see the writing on the wall and didn't want to be the next "Heisman winner who sucked in the pros." Didn't want to be the next Gino.

Antonio Gates: I think he made the right choice. Then again, he may have turned out to be a brute in the paint like a Charles Barkley. If I remember, Charles wasn't exactly towering over anyone.

John Elway: Did he play college Baseball?

I can't remember, but it seems like John Smoltz or Tom Glavin or someone like those guys was really good at Hockey. I could be confused with some other guy. I thought there was some MLB pitcher good at hockey.

Stack's reponse:
1. Jordan: Can't believe I didn't think of him.

2. Bo: Another great example. He might have been one where doing both was the right decision, if his health had held up.

3. McNabb: Football had to be the right decision.

4. Ward: Yeah, he saw the writing on the wall.

5. Gates: He's changing the way people think about the TE position, even more than Tony Gonzalez. Definitely the right decision.

6. Elway: He played baseball, he used it as leverage at the draft when he was selected 1st overall by the Baltimore Colts and managed to get traded to Denver. Again, right decision.

Comparison Shots

It was mentioned in the earlier group shot picture post that it would be interesting to see some of the older shots next to the newest one. So here you go. High school, circa 1999:


Baseball trip, Cleveland, circa 2003?


Around Christmas 2006:


I leave you to your comments.

Mo Pete?

With the acquisition of Chris Webber the Pistons have too many big men and will be looking to get some backcourt help. Apparently the Pistons have expressed interest in Morris Peterson, the former Michigan State star, among others. I was and still am rather skeptical about the Webber signing, but somehow I think I'd feel better if Detroit picked up a Spartan to offset the recent Wolverine addition. Also, he's only called real timeouts in championship games, and never perjured himself.

Super Bowl Pick

With this weekends conference championship games, my selection for the NFC representative in the Super Bowl is the New Orleans Saints. I'm actually not picking them to win, I WANT them to win. Why? I'll give you a moment.
.
..
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It involves the Lions....
.....

I want the Lions, out of bitterness, to be the last NFL team to ever reach the Super Bowl.

Here is where I need your help. If the Saints make the Super Bowl, that eliminates one more team that still hasn't played in the Title game, which still leaves the Lions as one of those teams. I know the Lions will make it some day. I'm just thankful they didn't make the Super Bowl prior to 1987, because I would have been too young or cognizant to realize what the SB was all about and that the Lions had accomplished such an amazing feat. I wouldn't have cared about football, Lions, etc. at that age. Since it's already been 41 Super Bowls, if the Lions had made the SB in 1987, I really don't feel like waiting another 41+ years to see if they make it to another SB.

So here is the contest:

Name the teams still remaining that haven't ever played in the Super Bowl.

I already gave you two. And I'm not sure if it's even fair to count the "recent" expansion teams, even though it's been almost 15 years. Then again, that was plenty of time to reach a SB for one of them. I don't have the answers, so good luck.

Gilbert Arenas

Does anyone think Gilbert Arenas is still a little upset that he was left off the USA Olympic Basketball Team? It seems he's had a few decent games this season.

Just For The Record...

...I am NOT in favor of the Pistons getting Chris Webber. Please tell me we aren't pinning our hopes on a pot smokin', lying, 12 year NBA veteran. I really don't think he is the missing piece to get to the NBA finals...for ANY team. I would also think that if he is SO good and just what the Pistons needed, then why would a team cut him? Why wouldn't they try to trade him?

The only thing I can come up with is that they cut him because no team would want to pick up his salary.

Culture of Me-dom

Mark Kreidler of ESPN.com has some interesting thoughts on celebration etiquette. You think maybe T.O. gets a mention? Check it out here.

Memories

An illustration of Matt and I back in our college days:

Christmas Picture

Well, actually the picture was taken between Christmas and New Year's, but you get the idea. That's just a classic look from Aaron.

Xbox 360 Experience

I had the chance to experience the Xbox 360 for the first time last weekend down in Ann Arbor. The game I played was "Test Drive Unlimited". I didn't get to have the full experience on a plasma screen in HD or anything, but it was still pretty cool on the 19 inch Sony flatscreen TV. Unfortunately he hasn't ponied up yet for the steering wheel controlling device to really get into the game.

Did You See The Memo About This?

We've all seen a memo. Whether one was sent to you or you sent one, you are probably familiar with what they are about. In today's society of promptness and sticking to tight schedules, we are all held accountable if we decided to one day show up late to work...or, show up at all. Usually if we make a decision to be late or tardy in our work, consequences are paid and punishment is given. Well, in light of the unusual weather we are experiencing this time of year, I wondered if Mr. Winter would be disciplined for his lack of job appreciation. We all have a job to do and he's not doing his...and getting away with it. Just because no one is complaining doesn't make it right. So, I wondered what it would be like if the Four Seasons had a "Board of Seasons Directors" and they were to send a memo to "Old Man Winter."

So, here is my attempt at what I think a memo would look like coming from the Four Seasons Commissioner addressing his "tardiness":

Dear Mr. Old Man Winter,

The residents of the State of Michigan and those of the midwest region of the United States of America wanted to make sure you realized that the first offical day of Winter was December 22, 2006. Our records indicate that to this date, January 12, 2007, you have yet to make an appearance. We also wanted to make it a point that the first offical day of Spring is March 21, 2007. Just so there is no confusion in your job description, you may "show up" when you like, but you are to be terminated as of March 20, 2007. You are alloted a working time frame, not a total amount of time. That means, if you arrive later than expected, the days you were late do not get to roll over into the start of a new season, thus pushing back the start time of Spring. For example, if you do not deliver snow until March 1st, you don't get to deliver snow after March 20 so you can make up for lost time. There is to be no "catch up" period. You can come in on any weekend prior to that end date and play "catch up" but that is all. No overtime. No grace period. Nothing.

However, it should be noted that if you decide not to produce any snow, most of the customers will not complain. Lucky for you, you have that luxury. Summer, unfortunately, doesn't get away with 60 degree days in June or rainy days in July and August. That does cause for some stress with the other "guys" in the group.

We thank you for your cooperation in this Winter Schedule "Budget." Times are tough in our Four Season Economy, so please understand our concern. We do not want to upset the other deserving seasons of the same pleasures and opportunities. We want you to know that your services are important.

And finally, your services are needed most from December 20 to January 5 to cover the Christmas and New Year's celebrations. Because no snow was produced during that time for the Spirit of Christmas, sales were down and you will be put on a suspension. Because sales declined, we had to make cuts in the 2007 budget. You are losing 30 days of your Winter 2007 season. That will take in affect January 5, 2008 because of the required mandate to have snow on the ground over the 2007 Christmas vacation.

Sincerely,

Mr. Summer Time
Chairman of the Four Seasons

Big Time Embarrassment

I don't know about anyone else, but I was embarrassed with the Big Ten in the college Bowl season. Things couldn't have started better: The Nittany Lions took care of business and then Wisconsin punched Arkansas in the mouth after everyone thought Florida's win over such a great Arkansas team earned them the right to the Championship game.

Then the wheels fell off. Purdue and Iowa lived up to their crappy playing all year. Minnesota decided to go Northwestern on Texas Tech (then again, was anyone surprised Texas Tech made that comeback?). Then Michigan left at halftime of the Rose Bowl to make it back in time for President Ford's funeral. Let me tell you, the funeral began after halftime. Thanks for putting the egg on my face for sticking up for Michigan.

Oh, and I can't forget the way Ohio State put the cherry on top of the Big Ten bowl display. How anti-Tressel of you. I know nobody is giving excuses, but something is probably going to change to eliminate 50 days of rest between huge games. Why is the Championship a week after all the other BCS games...on a school/work night? At least have it on Sunday so people on the west coast can be home in time for the game. Or a Saturday night so no one has to work the next day. I mean, if that game had actually been good or worth watching all the way till the end, like say, oh I don't know, Boise St. and Oklahoma, then the game would have finished well after 12:30 and people would have school or work the next day. Instead, everyone was able to go to be at 10:30 or halftime.

If they put off the Championship game any further, pitchers and catchers would be reporting to Spring Training. At least finish the Bowl season before the NFL playoffs. And, first and foremost, what are you doing sticking a GCRAP...errrr...GMAC bowl with Ohio after New Year's day? Stick that Toilet Bowl where it belongs...nowhere but in the regular season schedule.

Side note: That Boise State/Oklahoma game was UNBELIEVABLE!

NFL Coaching Openings

According to Detroit Lions Insider Tom "The Killer" Kowalski, apparently Mike Martz interviewed on Wednesday with the Miami Dolphins owner. I guess the owner flew from 80 degrees Costa Rica and into 10 degrees Detroit to meet with Mike.

I don't know. I really don't think the Lions can afford to lose Mike. He needs to stay and I hope he does. If he goes, I think that is a blow below the belt to the Lions "O."


UPDATE: Mike Martz is rumored to be the top candidate for the Raiders job.

Future Hall of Fame

In the spirit of the class of '07 Baseball Hall of Fame, I wanted to throw out a question. In light of Cal Ripken, Jr. and Glenn Rice...errrr...Tony Gwynn setting the record for highest percentage of votes received out of a record 545 total ballots, I'm curious what future Hall of Famer will break that record. But first, I want to give a little background: Of the 545 votes, Cal received all but 8 votes and Tony 13. Okay...question: What in the world were those 8 and 13 people thinking not selecting Cal and Tony for the HOF? What more were you expecting out of them from their careers? Compared to the other people in the list of HOF candidates, what didn't they accomplish in order to be put on your ballot? I mean, we're talking about Cal freakin' Ripken and Tony Gwynn.

So, that leads me to my question. If Cal and Tony didn't earn every vote, and they did deserve every vote, then what future player could ever get a higher percentage and is there any that could get every vote?

I think a few things need to be covered first. One, you probably have the typical voter that has an ego or chip on his shoulder and his agenda is going to come across. Some might think you have to "pay your dues" and can't get elected the first year. Or, some might know the guy is going to get voted in anyway, so why not use my vote on a guy that will need some help getting votes. And I think that is valid. If Cal and Tony pick up 1070 votes, I can't imagine there are many votes left to be given to anyone else. It will also be more difficult to get the hightest percentage as more voters are added each year (226 votes in 1936 and 497 in 1999). And, of course, biasness. If the best player ever to play the game was from the Red Sox, you know a Yankee writer isn't going to vote for him.

Ok, so here is my list of guys I think should or could get every vote, if not set the record for highest percentage of votes received:

1. Derek Jeter
2. Roger Clemens
3. Greg Maddox
4. Alex Rodriquez
5. Albert Pujols
6. Mariano Rivera
7. Randy Johnson

Cal Ripken Jr. 537 votes 98.5%
Tony Gwynn 532 votes 97.6%

This one's for Joe

Gotta love the A-10.

Hatin'

Could Joe Buck and Troy Aikman be a little tougher on Eli Manning? Apparently, if a guy isn't all fired up on the field, like Jeremy Shockey, he must be a terrible player. And, yes, the resurrection of Jeff Garcia is pretty amazing, but give it a rest.

You have to...

...hand it to the Cowboys, they sure know how to lose in memorable fashion. Of course, you don't think a team that lost its last game to the Lions would actually win a playoff game, do you? Looks like it will be a very long offseason for Tony Romo, but at least he won't have to worry about holding for kicks anymore.

The Jaw

If you were going to design the prototype football coach, he'd probably look like Bill Cowher. With that jaw he just looked like a football coach. But, after 15 years as the head coach of the Pittsburgh Steelers, Cowher is resigning. He was the longest tenured current head coach and only the second Steelers' coach since 1969. Cowher says he's not "burned out" and may coach again in the future (he's only 49), but for now he wants to spend time with his family and watch basketball since two of his daughters play at Princeton. The Steelers will find another coach, but it will be a long time before anyone else but Cowher looks right standing on the sidelines.

Cow Run

So, you've always wanted to drive a cow in a video game, right? Well, when Wii Play, a collection of small games for the Wii similar to Wii Sports, comes out you'll get your chance with Cow Run. (From Joystiq)



Looks pretty silly, but I can't deny the that it would be fun for at least a little while.

19

Steve Yzerman's number 19 was retired last night at Joe Louis Arena. Read the Detroit News' rundown of the event here. Many former players were in attendance, including Gordie Howe, Brett Hull, Larry Murphy, and even Vladimir Konstantinov. The event has also inspired the News to come up with a list by jersey number, 1-99, of the the greatest athletes in Michigan sports. Lots more if you follow the links.

Rise of the Silver Surfer

There's a trailer out for the new Fantastic Four movie, which you can check out here at the official site. My thoughts? I really like that almost the entire trailer is one scene from the movie. It does a much better job at getting me interested than the usual super-quick seizure-inducing cuts of various parts of the movie. The Thing still doesn't look right, Human Torch still looks good, and the Silver Surfer looks like, well, the Silver Surfer. He's not really that hard to get right if you don't try and change things too much. Just one question: Does this mean we get to see Galactus?

"Fundamentally Unbelievable"

Nick Saban has decided to leave the Miami Dolphins to coach the Alabama Crimson Tide. The coaching deal is for a guaranteed $32 million over eight years. Saban had repeatedly denied having any interest in the 'Bama job, many of which are recorded in the linked story. Pat Forde says Saban is a liar and "fundamentally unbelievable." Ouch. I don't understand leaving the NFL for college when you've been given everything you asked for in the NFL, but Saban must have found something that he wanted more back in college. I have to say I find this somewhat amusing. Every team that has lured Saban away with money and opportunity has had to be on the receiving end a few years later. I hope Alabama remembers that.

Congratulations...

...to Fritz for winning the 2006 Cass City Monkies Fantasy Football League with a decisive 197.80 to 128.80 victory over Schott. He also gets extra points for changing his team name to GOOD NIGHT NOW!!! with the victory. Ump comes in 3rd this season. I'll post more stats from this and previous seasons as I get the time.

FF Top Scorers '06

Here are the top scorers from the fantasy football league. This will be updated weekly. * denotes current record holder for the year. All-time is based on '04 on, which I have records for. The scoring was changed for the '05 season to include points for receptions. The highest team score in '04 was The Living Legend (Bader) with 206.95 pts. See the '05 data here.

Week 1
Top Player: Donovan McNabb, 48.10 pts
Top Team: All Night Long!, 181.50 pts

Week 2
Top Player: Peyton Manning, 58.20 pts
Top Team: All Night Long!, 182.60 pts

Week 3
Top Player: Brett Favre, 51.50 pts
Top Team: SKAtomic Bomb, 148.70 pts

Week 4
Top Player: Donovan McNabb, 55.50 pts
Top Team: Pooper Scoopers, 199.00 pts

Week 5
Top Player: Donovan McNabb, 51.50 pts
Top Team: Pooper Scoopers, 168.80 pts

Week 6
Top Player: Marc Bulger, 52.00 pts
Top Team: Pooper Scoopers, 217.00 pts

Week 7
Top Player: Peyton Manning, 58.10 pts
Top Team: All Night Long!, 201.20 pts

Week 8
Top Player: Tom Brady, 59.30 pts
Top Team: Pooper Scoopers, 228.10 pts

Week 9
Top Player: Drew Brees, 50.30 pts
Top Team: Pooper Scoopers, 184.40 pts

Week 10
Top Player: Steve McNair, 52.20 pts
Top Team: All Night Long!, 204.70 pts

Week 11
Top Player: Drew Brees, 57.00 pts
Top Team: All Night Long!, 212.30 pts

Week 12
Top Player: Tony Romo, 60.20 pts
Top Team: Time to lose again, 210.10 pts

Week 13
Top Player: Jeff Garcia, 50.40 pts
Top Team: All Night Long!, 165.60 pts

Playoffs
Week 14
Top Player: Drew Brees, 67.80 pts*
Top Team: Battletoads, 232.40 pts*

Week 15
Top Player: Michael Vick, 53.30 pts
Top Team: Time to lose again, 202.40 pts

Week 16
Top Player: Marc Bulger, 65.50 pts
Top Team: GOOD NIGHT NOW!!!, 197.80 pts

All-Time
Top Player: Peyton Manning, 75.20 pts ('04)
Top Team: Battletoads (Stack, '06), 232.40 pts

It would be funny if it wasn't true...

More than meets the eye.

There's a new Transformers trailer out. See it at Yahoo!.

Person of the Year

Time has selected their "Person of the Year." Who is it? Well, it's you, silly. And me. And those guys over there. Basically anyone who contributes to "user-generated internet content." Yeah, Time is actually that lame. Wouldn't want to have to make a hard choice, let's just make everyone feel good. You'd think they'd want to stir up some controversy to increase sales, but it appears not. The magazine will have a mirrored cover so you can see youself on it. Better be sure to pick one up. Your mom will be so proud.

UPDATE: Jonah Goldberg has something to say about this and it's much more clever than what I wrote. Check it out.

RE: 1.3

Apparently I need to straighten some things out before I'm killed. The reference to Aaron's High School girlfriend on a scale of 1 to 10 was referring to a blond by the name of B. Dore. I'm being completely honest here, Jody didn't even pop into my head that people might have thought I was referring to her. Why? Because I never thought of Aaron and Jody as boyfriend/girlfriend in high school. I viewed them as already married.

Mass Effect Gameplay

Want to see more Mass Effect? Of course you do. Check out the new gameplay video here. It looks especially sweet in 720p, though lower resolutions are available. The highlights? Well, I don't know about you, but I really want to play with the shotgun that disintegrates your enemies. The All-Terrain Rover being dropped from your ship and making a rocket-assisted landing is pretty sweet too. Can't wait to play.

Old v New

The other day I was doing some Christmas shopping in Target (or maybe it was some other store) and I noticed a few basketballs stacked on top of each other in their cute little basketball boxes. I checked them out and they said they were the new NBA balls. I thought, "cool." This was the first time I've actually seen the ball and able to touch it since the NBA changed over to a new microfiber synthetic ball compared to the old leathery balls. Apparently the ball is too sticky when dry and too slippery when wet. It has even caused minor cuts to some guy named Steve Nash. But, what do we care about Canadians? Check out the full story here. Effective immediately Jan. 1, all teams will change back over to the old leather ball...if they still saved enough for team shoot arounds, practice, etc.

Even though, statistically speaking, there has been an improvement in shooting, scoring, and ball related turnovers, it appears the league is changing back because of player injuries caused by the ball. What? Is there small shards of glass in the channels?

What would it be like if the NFL all of a sudden changed to a new ball? Or hockey to a different puck? Or soccer to...wait, it wouldn't matter, it'd still be boring and no one would score.

Vince Young

After his performance the last 8 games, and after his large contribution to my team in the fantasy playoffs, I'm one step closer to being a believer in Vince Young. I'm not sure he'll be better in the long run than Leinart, but I don't know that he'll be worse either. Rookie of the year? Probably oughta be.

Malarkey. Is that slang for bullspit?

I was subbing again on Friday, this time in Sandusky High School. The teacher was Mr. Kurt Wentzel. What does that matter? Well, in one of his classes for the day the class was supposed to watch "Band of Brothers." Again you say, what does that matter? Well, Mr. Wentzel's dad was part of Easy Company. He jumped in Normandy. Unfortunately he was wounded because of a machine gun shot to the leg. Eventually he had part of his leg amputated. I guess he was only there for D-1 or Dog 1 or something like that. Anyway, HBO flew the family to the Premiere five years ago.

Sorry, I tried to get a larger picture, but it wouldn't let me.

Finish the Fight

This is the coolest video game trailer ever.

1.3

This is a multiple choice question:

What does 1.3 represent?

A) Johan Santana's ERA
B) The TV ratings for John McEnroe's show
C) Aaron's high school girlfriend on a scale of 1-10
D) Rex Grossman's QB rating on Sunday

If you guessed C...you are wrong but dang that's funny. The correct answer is D. How much worse does he have to be before he gets benched? Is that a bad sign? That he won't be benched because there is only worse and worser on the bench. I'm sure Griese could do better.

Other fun stuff going on in the No Fun League:

The Colts just WR Ricky Proehl. Yeah, the 38 year old who "shinned" for the Arizona errrr...Phoenix Cardinals on the 1991 Nintendo game Tecmo Super Bowl.


John Mullin, of the Chicago Tribune, reports Chicago Bears RB Thomas Jones needs 73 rushing yards to surpass former RB Anthony Thomas for fifth place on the club's all-time rushing list. I didn't even remember the A-Train playing for the Bears. How many yards did he actually get? 1000 yards? It can't be too high, then again, how low is it to only be the 5th highest in team HISTORY?


For those of you who didn't know, according to Article 6, Section 23, paragraph 7 of the Super Bowl rule qualifications, no one from the NFC North Division is allowed to participate in the Super Bowl. Because the North Division is the weakest conference, a team may qualify for the playoffs, but will not be considered a contestant in the Title Game. So, I guess the Bears shouldn't even bother entering the playoffs if they aren't allowed to advance to the Championship game. Because the Bears play in such a weak conference giving them a weak schedule, they have been discriminated against, even if they are the best team in the NFL. But, they couldn't possibly be considered the best team if they come from a weak conference.

There is an asterisk in paragraph 7 that states if an NFC North Division team does in fact advance through the playoffs to Super Sunday, a vote will be taken by all the assistant coaches, trainers, chaplins, mascots, and cheerleaders to determine what team from the AFC West conference should take their place to represent the NFC because the AFC West plays a tougher schedule than any other conference. Head coaches are not allowed a vote as it may be a conflict of interest.

If that selection causes the Super Bowl to be a rematch of a previous game in the playoffs, then another team must be chosen, as long as they are still from the AFC West because of division difficulty and superiority.

This one's for all the marbles, boys

I don't know what any of you did tonight, but watching "Poolhall Junkies" on Spike TV was a good fix after screwing up a Pre-Calc test.

You watch those nature documentaries on the cable? You see the one about lions? You got this lion. He's the king of the jungle, huge mane out to here. He's laying under a tree, in the middle of Africa. He's so big, it's so hot. He doesn't want to move. Now the little lions come, they start messing with him. Biting his tail, biting his ears. He doesn't do anything. The lioness, she starts messing with him. Coming over, making trouble. Still nothing. Now the other animals, they notice this. They start to move in. The jackals; hyenas. They're barking at him, laughing at him. They nip his toes, and eat the food that's in his domain. They do this, then they get closer and closer, bolder and bolder. Till one day, that lion gets up and tears the crap out of everybody. Runs like the wind, eats everything in his path. Cause every once in a while, the lion has to show the jackals, who he is.

I wish I had Subtitles

'Cause then I would never have to repeat myself.


I think its a touch Pythonesque.

FFL '06 Regular Season Final Standings

Rank Team______________W-L-T__ Pct___Pts____ Streak
*1.All Night Long!______12-1-0__ .923__ 2262.90__ W-4
*2.Time to lose again___11-2-0__ .846__ 2089.80__ W-3
*3.Battletoads _________9-4-0___ .692__ 2001.30__ L-1
*4.Pooper Scoopers______8-5-0___ .615__ 2169.70__ W-2
*5.Crackers Dont Matter_6-7-0___ .462__ 1806.40__ L-2
*6.Losers! _____________3-10-0__ .231__ 1656.50__ W-1
7.Non-competitives _____3-10-0__ .231__ 1604.00__ L-2
8.Your Chance to Win ___0-13-0__ .000__ 1275.80__L-13

I would especially like to congratulate Kid Loe on his record-breaking 0-13 winless season.

Dick Vitale

Anyone wonder what Duke Vitale thinks about the BCS and Michigan getting jammed? If you watched or listened to Mike and Mike on ESPN radio Monday morning, I'd say Dick is slightly against the BCS process. Dick was so upset, you would have thought Duke was a bubble team for the NCAA tournament that failed to be one of the teams in the field of 64. I didn't know Dick cared about any other school than Duke. I can't even come close to describing in words how frustrated Dick was on the decision to exclude Michigan from the Title game. I couldn't tell if Duke fell out of the top 25 in the polls or if someone slashed all his tires.

Spoof

I'm all about the video today. Next up is a fan made Wii video spoofing a PS3 ad. And, no, sadly the Wii doesn't come in black yet. Hat tip: (Joystiq, Digital Battle)

Rural Rapper

This video is like nothing you've ever seen. It's also in French, but just ignore that. (Hat tip: The Corner, Tim Worstall)

BCS

I want to post this quick before the final selections are announced. I do think Michigan has "had their shot." I think they would have a very good chance at beating OSU if they played again. But, I really don't like the idea of giving them a "do-over", it seems cheap. I'm in a bind though because I think they are a better team than Florida, so I'm not sure what the right pick is. Stupid USC.

UPDATE: Gene Wojciechowski says Michigan got jobbed. He's probably right. And, for the record, I think Urban Meyer's campaigning for his team to be in the national championship game was low class.

Bowl Confusion Series

Wow! The BCS people (or computers) have managed to do it again. Congratulations on your crappy system of determining who the top 2 teams are. I want to reiterate once again, I don't care whom you vote for, just don't vote based on your opinion of a rematch, whether you want one or not.

Couple things that should be considered:

1) Before today's games, it was all assumed USC would win and play in the championship. There were no discussions when the BCS was updated on Sunday about Florida being #4. It was all about USC and Michigan. Florida might as well been #10 because no one cared. All we heard was "shame on Florida for scheduling a D-I AA team in November." Now what do we hear? "Florida plays in the toughest conference giving them the toughest schedule."

2) One thing I've hated from the beginning (since the Michigan loss to OSU) was the phrase, "Michigan already had their shot." You know what that phrase sounds like to me? It sounds like something a coach says before a game: "You know guys, we're not better than them, but we've got nothing to lose so let's give it our best shot." Or, the coach who doesn't want to play a certain player, but the whole team says, "Come on coach, just give Billy a chance." Like a prayer is involved. Like there is no hope, so just give them a shot at it. The phrase sounds like something an officer in the army would say to a bunch of guys who just failed at a mission..."anyone else want to give it a shot?" "We don't have a snowballs chance in Hades, so does anyone else want to give it a try." Kinda like working on a really hard calculus problem or science experiment. After trying everything possible, you just end up saying "nothing else has worked, let's give this a shot." My point is, everyone is basically saying no one is going to be able to beat OSU, so let's just try something else. You know it won't work, but you're just trying so you can say you tried. You know it will fail, but ah, what the heck, let's give it a shot. That phrase doesn't say they think someone will actually beat OSU, they just don't want to see Michigan again. They're not saying, "Hey, I think Florida has a chance to win." Instead it sounds more like "I want to see someone else get a chance to play." Not a chance to win, but a chance to play. The correct phrase should be: "Let's give _______ a shot to win." Because whoever plays, they're going there to win, not just give it a shot.

3) Florida, if they do play in the Title, won't have to play OSU at OSU in cold weather. It gets to be on a neutral field on a warm day. Which gives Florida an advantage UM didn't have...and UM still only lost by 3 points. You're telling me Florida is going to do better than a 3 point loss? Florida has already had 2 games decided by 1 point and 3 games decided by 7 points or less.

4) Who would win between UM and Florida? Apparently UM is a 6 point favorite, which means UM would beat Florida if they played each other. But yet Florida is supposed to "have their shot at it."

5) Once again, this is all about WHO ARE THE 2 BEST TEAMS IN THE COUNTRY. Nothing else. If you think Florida is the 2nd best team, great. If you think Michigan is, fine.

6) Every year is differnt, so don't go rewarding Florida (the SEC) because Auburn (the SEC) got the shaft 2 years ago. "Looks like the SEC got the shaft again." Cry me a river.

7) And finally, none of the talk is about who is going to beat OSU. If you read between the lines of all the arguments, basically everyone is saying OSU is going to win no matter who they play...but let's just give someone else a shot at it. Dang it, this is about who has the BEST shot at it. No one is saying Florida has a better shot to win than Michigan, they are just saying give someone else a shot. You should be picking a team you think can win, not just give it their best attempt. You might as well give Boise State a try. Heck, pick Wisconsin. They never played them at all this year.

What do I want? I want Michigan to play in "the other bowl game" and win by at least 2 TD's. Then I want Florida to get beat like a little girl by at least 2 TD's. Then I want to scream, "ARE YOU HAPPY NOW, IDIOTS?" You knew Florida wasn't going to come close.

Florida, go ahead and take that game against OSU. But by the way, no one thinks you have a shot to win.

In response to Craig James

Craig James just said on ABC, after USC's stunning upset loss to UCLA, that were the games to fall the right way he thinks Florida should face OSU for the national title rather than Michigan. Okay, that's fine and a perfectly respectable opinion. His reason? Florida plays in the SEC and played a tough schedule. So, although Michigan's only loss was to the #1 ranked team, Florida should go, because it's the SEC. There's lots of reasons to pick another team than Michigan to play for the championship, but dissing the Big (11) Ten? Please.

Just Can't Find The Right Words

I guess I should make some type of announcement that I got engaged October 8, 2006. It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon. We went down to the park in Bay City, just down by the river as you go over the bridge. All in the same neighborhood that they shoot off the notorious 4th of July Fireworks. Come to think of it, Aaron proposed to Jody before the fireworks in Bay City. Anyway, we enjoyed an unusual 70 degree day in October flying a kite I bought for $3 at Walmart. Then we did some rollerblading on the sidewalks. Later we sat on a swing together looking over the river. Finally, I got on the ole kneecap as the sun was setting on a clear sky evening. But then we had to rush to a conviencence store to buy a disposable camera. And yes, it was all a complete surprise. She had no idea it was coming.

This picture was taken at her sister's wedding in September. A March 31, 2007 wedding has been set.

Shawn Crable - Larry Foote

I know this is a little late, but I forgot to give my MAM (Monday Afternoon Moron) nomination after the Michigan-Ohio State game.

Was that Larry Foote who cracked Troy Smith as he was out of bounds after throwing up that 3rd and long prayer that fell incomplete late in the 4th quarter? It would have been 4th and 15 forcing OSU to punt and give Michigan the ball with at least 4 minutes and behind 4 points. Instead, Shawn Crable decided to go Larry Foote on Jeff Smoker and gave OSU an automatic first down from the personal foul penalty.

In case you forgot the 2001 classic, Larry Foote was the moron who hit Jeff Smoker with a personal foul enabling MSU to continue the drive late in the 4th quarter and...you know the rest of the story. Smoker finds TJ Duckett in the endzone on the controversial play, "The Longest...Second."

Side note: Two months ago I watched the 2001 MSU-UM football game on ESPN Classic. As I watched those final seconds before Jeff Smoker finally spiked that ball with "1 second" left, it actually didn't seem like it took any longer. If I had not watched the game live from Adam's apartment or if I wasn't a Michigan fan or even if I'd never even seen the game, I would never have thought anything was wrong with that "longer" second. Maybe it's because I've finally gotten over that game after 5 years (it helps take the sting away that MSU hasn't beat UM since then...hmmm, maybe there was an extra long second and the MSU Gods said to the UM Gods, "Okay, please give us 1 more play." And then the UM Gods said, "Fine, but if you win on this play, you won't win another game against UM for a very, very long time. Deal?" And I think MSU took that deal and said "Screw the underclassmen.").

Back to Shawn Crable and the "you can always predict a stupid penalty by Michigan in a huge football game." That's one thing that's always bothered me about Lloyd Carr. Somebody always does something stupid late in the game. Carr has never gotten his teams under control when it comes to plays like that. It never fails, I wasn't shocked at all, and it was a great call by the officials and UM deserved it.

Back to another Instant Classic between UM and MSU. I was watching the 1990 game, you know, the one where Desmond Howard was held then tripped in the enzone and then dropped the ball when he landed on the ground? That was the first time I'd really seen that play very good. What terrible officiating. But, I'm not writing to rip on the non-call. My point here is: What in the heck was Michigan going for the 2-pt conversion for? All these years that I've seen that score or the highlights, I had no idea that Michigan just scored a TD and chose to go for 2 instead of the smart thing to do, kick the extra point. Now that I know the True Hollywood Story on that 1990 game, I could care less if MSU cut off Desmond's legs and the officials still blew the call. I'm ticked that they were too arrogant to kick a lousy extra point. UM deserved to lose. One more thing. I thought that drop in the endzone was the final play of the game. Since I didn't know a TD was just scored and it was a play that didn't require time to be run off the clock, I didn't know that there was an on-side kick that Michigan recovered, giving them another chance to win the game. Bizarre.

Guza-ism

As I was walking down the hall from lunch to Mr. Green's room (yes, I was subbing for Mr. Green and that is a whole other post on Green-isms...or maybe just Mr. Green voice impersonations), I heard Mr. Guza starting up his lesson:

"Today we are going to look at the maximums and minimums of limits and before we can get to that, there are a couple of things we must do. Number 1, (as the 4th hour bell rings) we need to close the door so we don't hear all the noise in the hallways."

Speaking of voice impersonations, did anyone watch Letterman 2 weeks ago when the Late Show did Impressionist Week? It was pretty good. Of course you had Rich Little leading off the week. I'd put him at #3. Kevin Pollak was the last one of the week...and probably the worst. Worst is a hard term because he's a heck of a lot better than me, but not as good as the other impressionists. However, he did a killer Christopher Walken. That is probably his signature best. #2 would probably have to be Frank Caliendo. You may have seen him on Mad TV for his signature John Madden impression, which is pretty hilarious. He's also got a decent Robin Williams in his repertoire. But #1 by far was Gordie Brown. He has a show in Vegas. But what made Gordie so good was that his facial impressions were sometimes better than the voice. His Jack Nicholson was incredible all around, facial and voice. Basically, if you call yourself an impressionist and can't do Jack, you aren't an impressionist.

Well heck, I might as well let you watch the highlights here. Enjoy. The video feed might be horrible, but the sound should be fine.

Vacation Time

Adam,

What is your schedule for the Christmas holidays? I can't remember when you said you'd be coming home, but I remember you saying you were going to take a few more days off. Basically what I'm saying is...I can't wait to meet her.


Note: I'm fine with USC playing OSU in the Championship game. Only as long as the voters picked USC because they are the better team, not because they didn't want to see a rematch.

KOTOR will return...

According to this article on Next-Gen, Lucasarts VP Nancy MacIntyre says the Knights of the Old Republic franchise will continue. Being that Lucasarts can seldom resist turning a Star Wars game like KOTOR into a trilogy this isn't surprising news, but it's welcome nonetheless. KOTOR 2 is a good game, but it was rushed out the door which left many bugs and a significant amount of content cut from the game. They even cut most of the story involving HK-47, which is a crime against gaming. Hopefully a sequel can correct these flaws and end the series impressively. Sadly, it's unlikely Bioware would be involved, as they were with the original, due to their focus on original games (cough, Mass Effect, cough). Please don't screw this up Lucasarts. And give us more HK-47. And Jolee Bindo. And... I'll stop now. (Hat Tip: Joystiq)

Interesting Note

In bible study last night we were discussing Romans 6. This passage in particular was mentioned (from BibleGateway.com, NASB):

12 Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its lusts,

13 and do not go on presenting the members of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but resent yourselves to God as those alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God.

14 For sin shall not be master over you, for you are not under law but under grace.

The interesting part was the word instruments. The Greek word is hopla, which means a weapon or armor. This is the same word that hoplite, the heavy infantry of ancient Greece, is derived from. Interesting stuff.

A Thought

In 20-30 years, how many political campaigns will be ended by embarassing videos permanently floating about the internet? Think of all the myspace and youtube material that gets posted of people doing stupid things of questionable legality. If you think politicians dig up dirt now, wait until our generation is running for office, having forgotten that one night in college.

Expect many applications of the "Photoshop Defence" (patent pending) .

The New Guy?

According to this report in the Detroit News and this one at ESPN.com, MSU has decided to hire Cincinnati coach Mark Dantonio as their new head coach. We should know for sure later today.

UPDATE: It's official, Mark Dantonio is the new head coach of the Spartans. Dantonio was previously an assistant coach under former Spartan coach Nick Saban and current OSU coach Jim Tressel.

“What’s a guy got to do to get fired around here?”

Rumors are swirling that Matt Millen may (finally) be on his way out as GM of the Detroit Lions. After another embarassing Thanksgiving loss, and to a hated former Lions' QB no less, this is hardly surprising. There may be news tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Wiiiii!

I picked up the new nintendo last Sunday morning (only waited about an hour and a half) and took it home for Thanksgiving. I'll get around to a full write-up one of these days, but for the moment I'll run down a few impressions.

Everyone (brother-in-law, sisters, dad [mom didn't try...yet]) could pick up the controler and play Wii Sports. Fun was had by all.

If they can get the responsiveness down, a good boxing game could be one of the coolest things ever. The Wii Sports boxing is the only game in the compilation that does not function well. The ontrols are very nearly broken and its still fun to play. Ashleigh picked it right up and wasted the computer in the first round. I feared for the tv's safety. When we got a second controller (which are too expensive, but there are no third party ones yet, and when there are they won't be any good. They couldn't even copy analog sticks right, how will they do accelerometers?) she knocked me out. (her character got off the mat twice, mine...not so much.)

Zelda rocks. Controls well, especially considering it was originally a gamecube game. Combat is deeper than previos entries in the series. Its also huge. Not Morrowind huge, but whats there serves a purpose. Very few frustrating points, which is a big deal in a game like this. Excellent design all around (as it should be, it was originaly going to release LAST November). Not wild about the character designs on some of the side characters and the attempts at comic relief would not have been missed, but nothing is perfect.

No problems with the controllers. Some clever person thought to have them shut off when the system does, preventing super-scope like battery drains. Wii all thank you.

I will milk Wii related puns for all they are worth, its Nintendo's fault for choosing such a lousy name.

Sorry for the stream-of-consciousness post.

FSU v Florida: 10 Years Later

Lest you forgot, the 1996 state of Florida showdown consisted of #1 Florida at #2 Florida State. FSU won that game 24-21. That was the year Steve Spurrier put on his politician uniform and complained about the officiating. He claimed his QB Danny Wuerffel was taking late hits and no penalties were called. Well, the Ole Ball Coach got what he wanted. A rematch for the National Championship and a bunch of Florida lovin' refs who protected the QB on every touch of a FSU defensive player. Needless to say, Florida went on to win the Championship.

So, the precedent has been set. It's been done before. A rematch with a rival. However, those two teams were interconference rivals.

Again, I got what I wanted. A game that lived up to the hype last Saturday and finally a game that proves just because you lose doesn't mean you always have to drop in the polls. It took guts to vote for a defensive player for the Heisman in 1997. It's going to take guts and luck for a National Championship rematch in 2006.


Heisman Race:

I forgot to put in my vote last post: Troy Smith clinched the deal against Michigan.


GM of the Week:

Matt Millen, eat your heart out. For those of you Fantasy geeks, last Friday was the trade deadline for any fantasy football wheels and deals. I wouldn't exactly call myself a genius at making great trades, but I put my neck on the line and (so far) came out on top.

In one of my leagues I had to do the random order draft at Adam's appartment. It is a 12 team league and I got "screwed" with the 12th pick. The top 4 teams go to the playoffs. Well, up until two weeks ago my record was 7-0-2 (they are anti-fractional points, however I probably would have lost if they used the fractional points). But I'm still in first place. Well, one of the key players keeping me in first place was Mr. Donovan McNabb. As the deadline approached, I knew I no longer needed a two QB package. Who was my 2nd QB? Up and coming Philip Rivers. With no more byes, I didn't need both.

I put out a trade offer on McNabb in return for Chester Taylor. I think I did alright in that trade. He'll probably never trade with me again, especially since he didn't really need McNabb with Tony Freakin' Romo on his roster.

McNabb: 78 yards, 1 INT, 1 torn ACL = 1 point and done for season.
Taylor: 80 yards, 2 TD = 16 points


In my other league, it is also 12 teams and the top 8 teams make it to the playoffs. I'm not sitting nearly as pretty, somewhere in the 6 or 7 hole. I had just taken on the 10-0 team (my future brother-in-law) and was only down 18 points with Eli Manning and Muhsin Muhammad in the Sunday Night Football game between the Bears and Giants. Muhammad was the man and got me 14 points. 5 points from Eli shouldn't be asking much. (Keep in mind, the scoring is 40 passing yards per 1 point.) Basically 1 TD should seal the deal. No. Manning sucked. He got me -3 points. Needless to say I declared Eli would never see another snap on my team and put my money where my mouth was. However, I didn't have a back up QB. So, I traded Eli and Muhammad for Carson Palmer.

Eli: 230 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT = 7 points
Muhammad: 29 yards = 1 point

Palmer: 275 yards, 3 TD, 1 INT = 22 points.

I think I did pretty well there.


In another trade, someone offered me a TE and Jamal Lewis for Deuce McAllister. He offered me a TE because Tony Gonzalez just got injured. But, I have Colston, so I don't need a TE. (I got Deuce in week 4 along with Muhsin Muhammad in a trade for Willis McGahee. I think I did alright there too.) In this last trade involving Deuce, I countered his offer to get a WR instead of a TE because I didn't need a TE with Colston usable in that position. So I got Patrick Crayton from Dallas. I thought Terry Glenn was still injured, so that wasn't a good WR to go after. Anyway, here are Sunday's stats:

Deuce: 40 yards rushing, 29 yards receiving = 3 points.

Lewis: 91 yards, 3 TD's = 25 points
Crayton: 6 yards = 0 points

Keep in mind, I was given heck for trading Deuce: "He's got more TD's than my 3 RB's combined. What are you thinking?"

So, in one week in that league, I picked up 25 points from Lewis and 22 from Palmer. That's 47 points. How did I end up? Well, my team sucked and only managed 54 total...and lost by 9. Thanks.

Second Best or First Worst

Is this actually a year where Michigan is neither Overrated nor Underrated? I don't think any Michigan fan can complain about their ranking in the BCS after a loss. Then again, I don't think any non-Michigan fan can complain about their ranking either.

Was the game close? Depends on what your definition of close is. If we are talking from a scoring standpoint, then yes, it was close. But, UM needed 3 turnovers just to get it that close. What would the score have been if Michigan had at least one turnover or if the team down south only turned it over once or twice? More than likely not close. Then again, OSU scored 3 times on big plays. Take away those big plays, what happens? Nothing can be taken away, it all happened. What if, what if, what if just talks you into a circle. What if Michigan won? What?

We've all heard the arguments for and against a rematch. I'm not going to pile on either one of those arguments. In fact, I'm not sure where I even stand. I enjoyed the game. It was great. I sure can't complain from a sports entertainment perspective. What if the game was the first game of the year for either team and it was the same result. And then at the end of the year both teams are ranked #1 and #2. Would it be easier to call for a rematch under those circumstances? Because the difference between week 1 and week 12 is a long time. But wait, it's a pretty long time before their next game too, whomever they play.

But (there is always a but), neither Michigan nor OSU designed the schedule at the beginning of the year to say where they'd play the final game. It just so happened to be OSU's turn to host. So, IF the game would have been at Michigan, what would have happened? Which is why I'm slightly leaning toward seeing the game on a neutral field. I know I know, Lloyd can't win a bowl game and Michigan fan doesn't want to lose to OSU again, let alone twice in one season. Coach Carr already has enough L's in his name. I think it's now spelled: LLLLLoyd.

Well, I guess I proved my point...that I've managed to talk into 3 circles. Since I'm taking a pre-Calc class, that would be the equivalent of 6 pi.

Side Note: USC lost Matt Leinart, Lendale White, and Reggie Bush to the NFL last year, so how can they be just as good? I say USC is a fraud. You can't tell me they are just as good losing 3 amazing offensive players. Then again, I think Notre Dame is slightly less of a fraud and will beat USC. It's just that the world can't wait to exault Notre Dame any time they win a game. They can't wait to crown them every year they start out with wins over Georgia Tech and Penn State. If Georgia Tech and Wake Forest are dominating the ACC, you know the world is not round. The only teams ND has beat that are still ranked is G. Tech. USC on the other hand has only beat Cal and Arkansas that are still ranked.

P.S. Anyone surprised Joey Blue Skies picked apart the Detroit Lions like a Thanksgiving Turkey? Didn't think so.

Deep down...

...Tom Izzo is a football coach. You know this if you've followed MSU basketball over the past few years. So maybe it's not completely crazy that there are some rumors of him taking over the head coaching position of the football program. Now obviously this would only happen in Bizarro world, but here's a fascinating quote:

If someone asked him if he'd be interested in the job, "I would have to say no, but I'd probably deep down have to say yeah, I would," he said.

Huh. I think Izzo could do a good job, maybe even be a great football coach. But, on the other hand, making your national championship winning basketball coach into your football coach is crazy. And who would want the pressure of taking over his old job? Still, it's a strangely compelling idea.

Rematch

After watching the game this weekend, I don't want to see a rematch. I've heard every argument for and against a rematch and the fact of the matter is, Detroit still wouldn't beat Arizona.

Bad News for Ohio State

Besides the fact Lee Corso just picked Michigan to beat OSU on College Gameday (the first time ever he's picked OSU to lose a game when Gameday was at the 'Shoe). Side note: I think the camera crew scanned the crowd after Lee's announcement for 0.3 seconds. Why? Well, um...because the OSU fans were letting Lee know who was #1 team. Hmmm. I think it got a PG-13 rating.

Bo Schembechler, 205 pounds of twisted blue steel, died earlier yesterday. The face of everything that stands for the block M has passed away on the eve of arguably the biggest game ever played by either school.

I'm not trying to make light of one of the wisest coaches ever to coach dying, but this has to be probably the worst thing that could happen to Ohio State. This game is already the ultimate game of emotions, and now it just quadruppled...but for Michigan. Neither team needs any extra motivation for the game, but Michigan has probably just taken a slight advantage over the Buckeyes. If Michigan wasn't playing for Bo before, they just may now.

Good luck Ohio. You're in trouble.

Could there be a better week to be a man? Let's see: Wednesday was an ultimate guy day with the opening day of gun hunting season. If you don't like hunting, and you call yourself a man, then you've never met the working end of a Cuban made assault rifle. Next you have the greatest day to be a college football fan. Once again, I'll question your manhood if today doesn't get your blood stirring and wishing you were part of the hype that is smashmouth football.

In the spirit of Michigan-Ohio State week (no I'm not going to use the stupid cliche that ESPN has "coined" to describe the game as "Judgement Day"), it's time for my afforementioned list of top ranked (witnessed) Michigan-Ohio State football games (basically I'm listing every UM/OSU game I've been to):

6) 2004-Columbus: My first experience at the "'Shoe". Michigan unfortunately lost. 21-37.

5) 2001-Ann Arbor: The beginning of Tressel's dominance begins, just like he predicted in January the day he was hired. Also the first time I ever seen Michigan lose a home game out of 15+ witnessed. 20-26.

4) 2003-Ann Arbor: Carr finally gets Tressel. 35-21.

3) 1999-Ann Arbor: Michigan knocks OSU out of post-season contention. The first time they've missed a bowl game in who knows how many years. 24-17.

2) 1993-Ann Arbor: My first experience at the Big House. Michigan 28 OSU 0. I don't remember the details, but the TY LAW was laid down. I believe OSU entered the game either #1 or in first place in the Big Ten. It didn't end that way.

1) 1997-Ann Arbor: Two words: Charles Woodson. I think we've seen the highlights. He clinched the Heisman that day as Michigan went on to win a share of the National Championship. 20-14.


Go Blue

Questions We'll Never Know

Why is the grass green?

Why is the sky blue?

Why is Marques Colston listed as a TE/WR option for Fantasy Football? Who told Yahoo! that Colston "could be our TE this year"? Have you seen him? Does his body look like a normal speciman of a Tight End? Believe me, that's not Tony Gonzo running around out there. Besides, name me some Tight Ends that wear numbers like 12? What is that? 12? Colston is listed as 231 pounds. He's 6'4", so maybe he's a heavy 231. If so, that's either super amazing that a Rookie "WR" is tearing up NFL secondary's or it's incredibly sad that a Rookie has come into the No Fun League at 231 pounds and runs circles around DB's like a gazelle. Side note: I'm not complaining about this in my other leagues (best free agent pick up ever).

Apparently warnings are being issued to Michigan fans who may be attending the game Saturday in Columbus. For instance:

1) Use alcohol in moderation.
2) Anytime you feel unsafe, call 911 for assistance.
3) Stay in groups.
4) Do not drive a car with Michigan license plates.
5) Do not wear too much Michigan apparel.
6) Guard your anger against fan taunting.

Wow, thanks for that Public Service Announcement. Gee, don't those guidelines apply to any time you just go into the state of Ohio? I would think any smart person would always follow those simple steps to keep from getting killed. It shouldn't take a genius to figure out you are going into hostile territory. Thanks for telling us what we already knew.

How do you know if someone graduated from Ohio State?
If they ask you if you'd like fries with that.

I heard Jim Tressel was only dressing 22 players for the game.
The rest have to dress themselves.

What does Bo think about Jim Tressel's dominance over Lloyd Carr? Well, boy, I'm not sure if I should repeat it word for word, but he don't give a (darn) about Jim Tressel. And, in the spirit of the big game , I will rank my all-time Michigan-Ohio State games seen in person. Stay tuned.

I guess what I'm supposed to say is Thank You, I'm out.

This Just In

The Patriots just signed my cousin Vinny Testaverde. Yeah, that same guy on the Tampa Bay Buccaneers from the (Classic) 1991 Nintendo game Tecmo Super Bowl. His first season was actually 1987. Even Julio Franco thinks this is a crazy idea by the Patriots. Was Andre Ware unavailable? Wouldn't they be better off just grabbing ESPN loverboy Brady Quinn off the Irish? I thought Troy Brown was the 2nd stringer.

Either way, now that Testaverde is a Fantasy Free Agent, I wish I wouldn't have already traded for Carson Palmer in one of my other Fantasy Leagues. Dang, I really want Vinny.

Finally:

Dear Eli,

I bet you thought I was joking when I said to a fellow Fantasy League Owner "Eli will never see another snap on my team." Well, I'm a man of my words so hit the road. Thanks for nothing. Good riddance!

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The Grey Vest Man Jim Tressel was asked yesterday if he thought the loser of the Michigan/Ohio State game should be allowed to play in the National Champiionship for a rematch. He responded with, "If you don't win your conference, you shouldn't be allowed to play in the Championship game."

Well, Mr. Sweater Vest Guy, the National championship isn't about who won their conference. It's about who the two best teams are. And when everyone else has 2 losses and your team has only 1, I'd say no one else is better and they don't deserve a shot at the Title if they've already lost twice. If this Saturday's game is close, I don't have a problem seeing it one more time on a neutral field.

I'm curious. We hear so much about "Home Field Advantage" in sports. If we had to put that phrase in terms of Points, how many points would playing on your home field account for?

Is the Michigan v Ohio State football game this Saturday?

Sincerely,

Women, anyone living on Mercury, Venus, Mars, Saturn, Jupiter, Neptune, Uranus, Neptune, and probably Pluto, Bears starting an early hibernation, people without a pulse, masses of protoplasm taller than 6'6", and everyone else still living under a rock.

P.S. I don't see what the big deal is about Bob Knight's lastest incident. I think it's been blown way out of proportion.

Sincerely,

Albert Haynesworth

Remembering Bo

I'm really, really the wrong person to eulogize Bo Schembechler, so I'll just point you to bob Wojnowski's article in the Detroit News. There's also another piece about how Bo spent some of his last hours inspiring the team to beat OSU. I'll leave Ump to pick up the slack on this one, or Aaron if he can be coaxed out of hiding.

Dogfights

Dogfights is one of the coolest things the History Channel has ever broadcasted. It has the usual mix of old footage and new interviews that you're familiar with if you spend any time watching the History Channel. However, it also includes CG recreations of the famous dogfights the episode is focusing on. According to the site, up to 25% of the program is made up of animation. I haven't made it all the way through the episode I'm watching, but I can confirm there's enough animation to keep it interesting. Great stuff.

More Mass Effect (Again)

Once again, this game will make me buy a 360. (Hat tip: Joystiq)

To answer...

...Ump's question, this is the villain known as Sandman:


If you're asking about the Fantastic Four, you may be thinking of the Thing:


Any more questions?

Worst. Episode. Ever.

"G.I. (Annoyed Grunt)" was the worst episode of the Simpsons ever.

Scene Canary

I went to a game night last night with my Sunday School class. There was dinner, then we played some games. Party games. I just love party games. We played Catch Phrase, which isn't too bad as party games go. Anyway, a new couple had showed up and joined the group. We were split into teams of guys and girls and I was sitting by the new couple. I passed the disc and saw the next phrase was "Sean Connery." I saw it and thought to myself, "This is a gimme." The new girl's husband had looked and thought the same thing. But she must have misread or just wasn't thinking, because I don't think she's stupid, and started giving clues that lead to the answer "Scene Canary." By this time, her husband and I were both struggling to stay on our chairs while everyone else looked confused. Until we told them. Three hours later, we stopped laughing. Well, it might not have been QUITE that long. Funniest thing I've seen all week.

New Record

On Friday, I broke a record. Eight guys from work went to Eddington's for lunch. They serve sandwiches, salads, and most notably, soup. They're best known for their bottomless bowl of soup. You take your bowl back to the server and they refill as many times as you want. Of course, work being what it is, a challenge had been instituted as to who could consume the most soup and breadsticks. The current record was 4 bowls of soup and 4 breadsticks, held by our summer intern Dan. Another employee from Moline was second with 4 bowls and 2 breadsticks. Keep in mind, my boss and I had not been there before. We hadn't planned on going on Friday either, so there was no preparation. But once we got started, pride kicked in. We couldn't let those lightweights keep the title. So...

Five bowls, five breadsticks.

In case you're wondering, these weren't thin soups. We're talking Chicken Tortilla Chowder, Boundary Waters Wild Rice, Wisconsion Cheddar Cheese, and USS Navy Bean. Hearty. Also, apparently consuming that much soup will raise you body temperature.

Ultimate Bat

The Tigers have traded 3 pitching prospects to the Yankees for slugger Gary Sheffield. Sheffield, who is 38, has agreed to a $28 million contract extension through 2009. Sheffield has previously won a World Series title with the Marlins, who were managed by Jim Leyland and who's GM was Dave Dombrowski. Said Leyland of Sheff:

"This is one of the ultimate bats in baseball and one of the ultimate people in baseball. I have the utmost respect for him. I can't tell you how happy we are. It's almost unbelievable. It's hard for me to believe that we landed Gary Sheffield."

The Tigers certainly need a bat after their anemic hitting in the World Series. Still, after being injured most of the past season, just how much does Sheff have left in him?

Spider-Man 3 Trailer

Quotes of the Week

Roy Williams, Lions (and NFL) star WR, Monday afternoon on Stony and Wojo:

"We're the best 2-6 team out there."

Side note: Roy is very well spoken when he does his token 10 minutes
every Monday at 5 p.m.

Tony Kornheiser, MNF color commentator said the following about Randy Moss -- "If you throw it to him five times, he'll come up with two of them, so the percentages are in his favor." This classic comment came during the 4th quarter of that gut-wrenching show the Raiders call football v the Seahorses. Good thing he's not a surgeon. Now, I was only half listening to the game because it was boring, but I had to give a double take when I heard that, so I could be wrong. I just don't know who else would have made a comment like that. I can't imagine Joe Theismann saying that, no matter how hard Lawerance Taylor crushed him.

Lebron James, ESPN's boyfriend during the Pistons-Cavs playoff series, had this to say about all the recent technicals being called: "Technicals are being thrown like Peyton Manning passes." Lebron, I think you meant more like Peyton Manning TOUCHDOWN passes.


Other Thoughts:

For those of you who don't watch basketball, David Stern has been making a few changes in the marketing schemes of the NBA, now that they are going global on us. They are toning down the language, whining and complaining to officials, headband and uniform dress code, etc. Oh, and he also wants his players to stop carrying guns every time they so much as check the mail.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to clean up a league's image to give it a better reputation and look more professional/business-like.

And you know what, it must be catching on. The NFL is clearly the league most in need of some serious housekeeping. Just think of all the things the new commish has improved. From Albert Haynesworth's stomp to Brayton's knee, there's too much sociopathic behavior taking place on the field. The league's response has been minimalist, taking every incident separately, mainly because the NFL knows it treads a very fine line when it tries to legislate abhorrent on-field behavior.

Oh, but the NFL has taken steps to make sure no one spikes the ball or does some stupid post-touchdown choreography. And how about those socks -- not a shred of shin showing!

I'm (insert politition name here) and I support this message.

It's a Girl!

That's right, Nathan is a daddy now. Congrats to Jaime and Nathan.

Here is a pic of the baby.

I think she looks like her daddy.

Rumor Mill

So, who was seen on campus after the MSU-Purdue game?

This guy.

Hmmm...


And these guys.

Sincerely,

Ocho Stinko

Your horse, Lord Vader

Invasor won the Breeder's Cup Classic today and $5 million dollars. Why should you care? Well, you shouldn't as far as I'm concerned; I certainly don't. But where did that name come from? Invasor isn't a name for a horse, it's a name for an Imperial Star Destroyer. "Lord Vader, the Invasor is at your command." Just thought I'd point that out.

Loophole

Wisconsin coach Bret Bielema has found a loophole in the new NCAA rules. The rules say that the clock starts as soon as the kicker's foot touches the ball at kickoff. With little time left in the first half, Wisconsin intentionally went offsides twice to run the clock down to under ten seconds. Although a penalty was called, 8 seconds or so ran off the clock each time. Oops. That's going to need to be fixed. What's to stop a team from getting a lead and doing that for the rest of the half?

Moon Knight: The Series

Blade couldn't cut it on television, so now Moon Knight gets an opportunity. It was announced on Oct. 25th that Marvel Entertainment would be teaming with No Equal Entertainment to develop a live-action series. Personally, I think this could have some potential. If they went for a Batman Begins vibe with the show, which wouldn't be too difficult since Moon Knight shares quite a few similarities with the Dark Knight, it could be successful. And there could be werewolves. But then the whole thing could be screwed up pretty easily. The hero's name is Moon Knight after all. And I'm not sure which network would go for it. Still, it will be interesting to see where it goes.

I'm not sure what it is...

But I want one.
(Sorry, the site won't let me steal the pic)

Golden

Kenny Rogers, the only Tigers pitcher who knows how to field a baseball, won his 4th straight Gold Glove award yesterday. It was his fifth overall. The young guns on the Tigers' pitching staff need to pay attention to Rogers in the offseason and see if they can pick something up, because they sure can't afford to field as poorly as they did in the World Series. Pudge also won his twelfth Gold Glove, which extends the record for catchers that he currently holds.

Re: Adios

Adam, do you have a crystal ball over there? Has Ron Mason been hitting you on the hip looking to pick your mind? I'm going to take off my block M hat and think as a general sports fan living in Michigan. It seems MSU has a lot of parallels to the Detroit Lions organization. It's not the players. It's not the coach. John "Too Many L's" Smith had great credentials. Everyone has to admit he ran a fun watching offense. The shuffle pass is one of the greatest things since sliced bread. Saban was obviously good. But, when the MSU brass look at the 5th year seniors and realize none of them have beat Michigan, heads are going to roll Steinbrenner style.

It just doesn't make sense. You couldn't ask much more from your coach. He practically started every year on a big 4-0 run and even 7-0. Hype. Heisman talk. BCS contention. Then the wheels fell off. But not only that, but they fell off 4 staight years and not even Fisher Price wheels were put back on. Apparently each year's first loss was the mental part he couldn't correct. And they weren't just "losses." These were, as Adam would put it (or Kirk Herbstreit), textbook MSU losses. Had the game and blew it.

I realize I'm preaching to the choir here, so I'm just going to stop.

Side note: Adam, how do you get the format that when you copy a quote that it indents the entire passage?

Ocho Cinco...

...has been fined $5,000 for his velcro shenanigans before last Sunday's game. He'll appeal the decision. I usually hate this kind of thing, but I thought the Ocho Cinco velcro nameplate was actually pretty funny stuff. But why appeal? Come on Chad, you knew the price when you planned the stunt. Five G's seems like a pretty good deal, don't you think?

Adios

So, John L. Smith is toast, as I predicted. I've been a fan of Smith's and I think most of the griping about him, especially early on, was just idiotic. The only real knock against Smith when he was hired was that his teams weren't know for being disciplined. If you thought he was a bad hire because of that, you get a cookie. Otherwise, you're just a jackass who's trying to look smart in hindsight, so get over yourself. Having played on a team that just wouldn't respond to a good coach I'm more likely to give Smith some slack. But when it comes down to it this team's psyche was made of glass, and that goes on the coach. It has to. The players aren't happy about the firing. Guess what guys? Tough. You had the power to keep your coach's job. And you didn't get it done. Again. And again. And again. Too many heartbreaking losses; the kind of losses that will turn your stomach years later. Frankly, I'm sick of Michigan State football and probably won't watch another game the rest of the year (they are usually on here in MN). If I feel like, how do you think alumni who actually donate feel?

So who becomes the next coach? This article has a few ideas, some of them are even good. But, please, not Brian Kelly (Hotshot young coach + MSU football = pathetic failure) or Ron English (No table scraps from the Wolverines). And, for the love of all that is Sparty, don't hire Mariucci. Don't. Even. Think about it. My pick? I don't care, because this is how I think it's going to unfold:

So how is this going to play out? I'll tell you. MSU loses it's next 2 games against superior teams, but the calls for Smith's head get louder. The Spartans can't pull enough wins out of their last 5 games and don't make a bowl game. Smith is fired. Smith's recruiting gains go out the window, along with his high-octane offense. MSU begins its coaching search, which turns into a pathetic circus. At the end MSU has an unexciting new coach and a new offense, as well as a slew of soon to be broken promises. Spartan football goes into rebuilding mode and is set back a decade. Dire? Maybe, but that's the path this program is on. There's no easy solutions and a new sheriff won't be able to clean up EL overnight.

But maybe I'm wrong.

"Man on the loose, Officer needs assistance!"

Not so much. Apparently two guys thought they would "help" the police capture a man who was fleeing into a woods they were allegedly hunting in. Here is the full story. Two guys put their camo on and walked through a police perimeter into the woods the man was chased. The two men, 17 and 25, were armed with shotgun and a hunting bow. They found the suspect hiding under a tree and brought him out of the woods at gunpoint.

I can picture it now: "Here you go guys. I got him for ya. Yeeeeee-haaaaaw."

Look you red-neck degenerates. Get your ace out of there. This isn't Walker, Texas Ranger.