Drunken Lemurs

"Today I learned that people don't like drunken lemur analogies."

A First Place Moment

Some things are just too good to last. From approximately 10:30 pm ET last night until the end of the Tigers game this afternoon the Pistons, Red Wings, and Tigers were all in 1st place in their divisions. Of course the Tigers ruined this by getting walloped by the Wahoos. Sigh. Nothing gold can stay.

Old School

Check this out. You're sure to love it, especially if you're Haag.

Spring Scrimmage

The Spartans have completed their spring scrimmage and the defense is looking much improved. The kicking game is looking better as well as walk-on sophomore Todd Boleski was able to complete FGs from 40, 47, and 55 yards. This news is especially encouraging as these two areas have been a major part of the Spartans' struggles in the last half of the last two seasons.

And what crazy activity does John L. have planned for the summer? He's staying home with his wife as she undergoes treatment for breast cancer. I wonder if the TV announcers will tell us about that every game, or if they'll keep talking about Kilimanjaro? With that and the pressure of two consecutive poor seasons, there's plenty of pressure on Smith. But, in typical John L. fashion: "Who really cares? What you care about is those kids and what we're doing now. Hell, if I get fired, who cares? So just try to take care of today."

The Easter Bunny...

...Hates You!

Lions News

Mike Martz has made a big impression on the players after the Lions' three-day minicamp that ended on Thursday. Also, the Lions have re-signed safety Terrence Holt.

And now, deep thoughts with Jack Handy

Remember when the Tigers were 5-0?

Busch Stadium III

If you're like me, you knew the Cardinals were getting a new ballpark in St. Louis, but you didn't know it was opening now. You can see some pretty good pics of the new stadium here.

Power Up

This is the best prank ever. You make Mario-style question blocks out of cardboard and shiny paper, fill them with power-ups, then hang them out in public spaces. It funny and cool, unless people freak out. Which is, of course, what happened in the town in the story. Apparently they thought it was likely that Osama Bin Laden is into video game culture and would use question blocks as a cover for bombs, when obviously he would choose to use POW! blocks instead. You can see the site that inspired the prank here, which also provides materials so you can do it yourself. Not that I'm recommending that. Okay, I am. Go now.

Gotta wait another year

The NFL released the 2006 schedules today. You can check them out here...if I actually felt like adding a link to my post. But, good news for Adam. The NFL must have assumed you were getting a job transfer to Michigan, because that is the only way you'll see a Lion game on TV as MNF has once again given the Lions the shaft.

I'm So Sick

I recently bought the debut album of a band called Flyleaf. I had purchased their EP previously and was glad to discover that the band was able to fill a whole CD with good songs. Anyway, rather than tell you more about them, you can look and listen for yourself:

The Natural

There's an interesting article on ESPN.com by Len Pasquarelli about Reggie Bush. Matt Leinart also features, but it's mostly dealing with Bush. Apparently he's engaging in a way few players are, and he seems to have his head on straight. Recommended reading if you want to know more about the future 1st pick in the draft.

What if there was a draft and no one came?

That question was answered last night in the fantasy baseball league. Luckily, I think everyone ended up with pretty decent teams, though Joe is a little Tiger-heavy, which is quite the gamble. Go to the league home page to check it out.

Exploding Hamsters

I read this last night on NRO:

BY THE WAY... [Jonah Goldberg]
If you subscribed to NR digital not only would you gain the power to telekinetically explode hamsters at distances up to 100 yards*, you could also read my mag piece on isolationism.

* Note: no refunds will be offered in the unlikely circumstance you are unable to explode hamsters after the start of your subscription.

Now, I'm a subscriber, and I haven't been able to telekinetically explode hamsters. Well, come to think of it, I've been around guinea pigs and mice since I subscribed, but not hamsters. Hmm. I think I'm going to the pet store...

Hall of Fame Material

That's what Joe Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-mars is, according to a report from the AP. The official announcement will be Monday. Dumars was an all-star 6 times, a Finals MVP once, and he won the first NBA sportsmanship award, which now carries his name. He also won 2 championships as a player, and a third as the president of basketball operations with the Pistons. Congratulations Joe.

Wallpaper 4-1-06

Here it is:

Thoughts from the Week

There's been a couple things I wanted to comment on this week, but didn't take the time. Here they are now:

- Something awful happened this week; I agreed with the hatable Dan LeBatard. He made the comment "I like women, I like sports, but I don't like women's sports." Wilbon ripped him for it. I wholeheartedly agree. I'm glad there are women's sports, but I'm not interested. I also find it really frustrating when people try to guilt you into watching, or call you sexist if you don't. I skip the WNBA for the same reason I skip MLS: I just don't care. End of story.

- Jim Boeheim thinks the NCAA tourney field should be expanded. Boeheim's a great coach, but this is a stupid idea. Really. Obviously there would be huge logistical concerns. And there would still be teams left out, let's not kid ourselves about that. But those are side issues. Boeheim's main argument is that the success of mid-majors this year shows there are many teams out there who could win games in the tournament. He also noted on PTI that it's been a long time since teams have been added. Well, it hasn't been that long since an extra team has been added, but whatever. Time isn't much of an argument, so let's throw that out. So let's hit the main point, which revolves around George Mason's success, and a lack of understanding of how tournaments work. Was George Mason a Final 4 team most of the season? No, they really weren't that great. But they got real hot at the right time. Which demonstrates the primary characteristic of a tournament: it's not the best team that wins. This is especially true in basketball where the 3-pt shot is such an equalizer and one bad shooting night means doom. The Spartans should have beat George Mason in the first round, but they have one of the most lifeless and uninspired performances ever. Do you really think GM is better than Duke? We've decided a tournament is a fair way to determine the champion, but all it really determines is the survivor. Finally, do you really wanted to fill out more blanks in your bracket?

- I'm watching the 1988 #1 Notre Dame vs. #2 USC game on ESPN Classic. This is the kind of thing ESPN Classic should exist for, not all their stupid filler shows. It's refreshing to hear Griese and Jackson together, and not to hear from sideline reporters every 2 minutes. I'm convinced whoever sets up a system to allow complete college football games on-demand will make a mint, but apparently entertainment companies don't agree with me.

Funny

This picture was sent to me in an email at work this week:

Payback is...

The Seahawks have struck back against the Vikings. They signed WR Nate Burleson to an offer sheet on Friday. Minnesota can match the offer sheet, but they won't because it will cost them too much. Why? "Poison pills" in the agreement. An example: if Burleson plays more than 5 games in Minnesota any season of the contract, the entire $49 million becomes guaranteed. I can personally confirm that the Vikings are still in Minnesota, so this becomes an impossible deal to match. Of course, the Vikings should recognize this strategy, since they did exactly the same thing to the Seahawks with Pro Bowl guard Steve Hutchinson earlier in the week. Their poison pill said that if Hutchinson wasn't the highest paid lineman on the team, his $49 million salary was guaranteed. Not a problem for the Vikings, but Seahawks tackle Walter Jones would have been paid more. These poison pills have held up in arbitration, so this could change the way restricted free agents are treated in the NFL. Obviously, what the Vikings and Seahawks have done is against the spirit of the rules, and quite dirty. But it's unlikely anything will change until there's a new CBA, and since the ink isn't dry on the current one, that will be a while. It does beg the question: What's the strangest poison pill you can imagine?

Behind the Scenes

So, what exactly happened that Joey Harrington went from being the starting QB in Detroit, supported by coaches, to headed out of town? That's what this article in the Freep asks. It seems that it boils down to that Harrington wasn't willing to give total devotion to the team because the players who basically tried to stir up a rebellion against him last year, like Dre' "Useless Apostrophe" Bly, were still around. Interesting reading.

Free

Download old movies and other stuff, free and legal. Not sure if registration is required, I haven't tried it yet. Lots of bad old movies ( the killer shrews), and a few that are even recognizable (Nosferatu).

Na na na na...

...Na na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye Joey. ESPN is reporting that the Lions have signed free agent QB Josh McCown. Despite public support from Martz and Marinelli, this move almost certainly spells the end of Harrington's run in Detroit. So, who will be the new starter: McCown or Kitna?

Tourney Challenge

In case you haven't looked, I've started a Tourney Challenge group on ESPN as well as Yahoo. The one on ESPN is as usual, you should have an email about the Yahoo one. If not, let me know and I'll hook you up.

QB Shuffle

Free agency really heated up today. First, Jon Kitna agreed to a four-year deal with the Lions. Next, the Dolphins gave up on Drew Brees and acquired Daunte Culpepper for a 2nd-round draft pick. Apparently seconds later Drew Brees signed with the Saints. Got all that? The Lions also re-signed Kalimba Edwards.

The Lions now have 4 QBs on the roster: Joey Harrington, Jon Kitna, Shaun King, and Dan Orlovsky. Now the big question is whether Kitna, who had a great 2003 season before Carson Palmer became the starter, will unseat Harrington. Also, Orlovsky would seem to be in jeopardy of even making the team.

Finally, these moves will make the draft much more interesting. Most experts expected the Saints to draft Leinart with the #2 pick, but now it seems quite possible that they might trade down or take someone else. This could lead to one or two of the QBs, like Vince Young or Jay Cutler falling further than anticipated.

Grant: The Action Figure

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be immortalized in plastic? To join the likes of Samuel L. Jackson or Harrison Ford? Well Grant no longer has to wonder:


Okay, you might not be able to see as well in that pic, maybe this one will help:


If you're not convinced, I've seen it in person, so you'll have to take my word for it, the figure bears a strong resemblance to Grant, especially at the right angle. Sure, it doesn't have xylophone action, but it is still pretty cool. Two questions though: 1) Why is he Army infantry, and 2) will Noah be jealous? You can see more pics here.

NFL Moves

Roster moves in free agency are flying fast and furious. There's been many moves so far this weekend, but I'll only bring up the most notable. First, Edgerrin James has signed with the Cardinals. That loud thump you just heard was his fantasy stock hitting the floor. I guess we now know whether Edge wanted to win or to get paid. Good luck. I'm sure the Cardinals will be a trendy pick in the preseason, and then will be terrible. They have a nice new stadium though. Antwaan Randle El, the biggest name at WR in free agency, has reportedly signed with the 'Skins. Maybe Dan Snyder is trying to build a team rather than just buy one? Finally, Ron Dayne has elected to stay with the Broncos, making him the current favorite to be the starter at the most valued position in fantasy football, Denver RB. That could mark a big turnaround for Dayne, who's been a disappointment since he came into the league in 2000.

Mmmm... doughnut burger.

Now I'm not even attracted by the idea of a doughnut burger, but apparently the Gateway Grizzlies think their fans will be. The burger, which is a pattie topped with sharp cheddar and two slices of bacon between a Krispy Kreme doughnut, will have 1000 calories and 45 grams of fat. The team plans to sell it for $4.50, and it will only be available in the stadium. I guess the real question is: Will it be a match for the Roethlisburger?

Finally

The NFL, showing it was actually paying attention when the NHL nearly killed itself with labor problems, extended its CBA when the owners agreed to the players' proposal. Free agency will begin at 12:01 am Friday.

Brick

Yesterday I had a package arrive from home. It was a "flat rate" shipping box from the USPS, which means you pay one price for the box, no matter how much weight you put in it. There were assorted goodies, cookies, a shirt, etc. But none of those really took full advantage of the lack of weight restrictions. So what did my family find to put in it? A brick. But not just any brick:


Okay, it might not be THAT brick, but it is a brick from Sparty's pedestal. Maybe I'm just silly, but I think it's pretty cool.

RE: Motion Denied

That is awesome. Here's the footnote for those of you that are clicking impaired:

Motion Denied

because you're an idiot

-fed judge cites Adam Sandler in ruling.

The funniest thing I've seen all day...

...is right here. Check it out, you won't be sorry.

She's still around

You know the sadest part of the Olympics ending? No more Melissa Stark sightings. Oh wait, never mind. She just did a 4 minute "Sports Report" on NBC during the 3rd round coverage of Golf's Ford Championship. Whew! Well, I should probably stop posting for the day. I only have a 2 post limit for a week.

Actually what's sad is I spelled "saddest" wrong.

(Not) Hot Off The Press

Well, sorry it took so long to put up the infamous Tourney Bracket results. I know you've been wondering since filling out all your office pools. So, exactly one month later (and one reformated computer later) I can finally scan things back on my PC. Of course this was the #1 priority.

Optimistic about China?

Don't be. Unperforming loans, goverment control of industry, massive corruption. I wouldn't rush out to stake my long term financial plans on Chinese stability. Of course, many major companies dissagree and are falling over themselves to pour cash in (GM, call your office). End result: when China adjusts itself to whatever end, we all feel it. I may be doing some work over there in the near future, but we're selling to a foreign company, no long term involvment, basically grabbing some cash now and letting the Belgians worry about it.

Not on the Nightly News

Read this. Too bad no one will find out, as the news won't bother to report it. Even Fox news will probably be too busy with the latest pretty young woman getting murdered/disappearing.

Custom Hats

Ever wanted your own custom hat? Well, Lids has the tools you need. A few clicks and you can have your own custom cap. Or beanie. Or bucket hat. But not visor. And, yes, they do have monkeys available.

Idiots!

Fools. The NFL and the Player's Association failed to reach an agreement on a new CBA again today. This could lead to an uncapped year in 2007. For a league that seems to never make a wrong move, this is incredibly stupid. Hockey has provided a great case study in labor stupidity by both players and the league. A large part of the popularity of the NFL is based around its labor stability. Serious damage could be done to the league if this isn't figured out. This could be a disaster.

Wonderlicked?

There are rumors floating around that say Vince Young scored a 6 on the Wonderlic test on his first try, but then scored a 16 the second time around. A score of 20 is roughly equivalent to an I of 100, or average intelligence. There are also reports that the initial rumor was false. There are also rumors that Young may fall as far as #7 to the Raiders, though that's pure speculation.

Now, I've taken a Wonderlic test, so I can speak intelligently about it, though I don't know what I scored. You take a fifty-question test in 12 minutes; I'm pretty sure when I took it we were only given ten. Here's some example questions from this FoxSports article, which explains a little about the test:

Look at the row of numbers below. What number should come next?
8
4
2
1
1/2
1/4

In printing an article of 48,000 words, a printer decides to use two sizes of type. Using the larger type, a printed page contains 1,800 words. Using the smaller type, a page contains 2,400 words. The article is allotted 21 full pages in a magazine. How many pages must be in smaller type?

None of these are terribly difficult, but when you're rushing to get through them in the alloted time they are difficult enough. You might also notice that there's nothing football-centric about the questions. Apparently there are some that think the test is culturally-biased. I suppose that might be true, if stupidity is one of your cultural values. Let me clear though: I don't think Young actually scored a 6, unless the test was administered wrong or there were other extenuating circumstances. Mostly, I just think it's amusing how people get so worked up over this test when they have no idea what it is.

Uh...Haag?

Be careful, I think Noah can kill you with his mind.

Homeless?

No place to lay your head? Can't afford rent? Does GMC have the solution for you: the GMC Pad. It's like an RV, but "hip" and "modern". Or something. I guess it beats living in a storage unit. Questions as to whether GM could actually sell this thing are pointless since it's not even a true concept, and certainly not a production vehicle. It's the winner of the 2006 Design Challenge. It impressed because of the innovative concept, not necessarily its marketability. But maybe for roadtrips...

Football 101

Joey Harrington is going back to school. He was just enrolled in Professor Martz's class, Football 101. It starts March 6th, two weeks before any other team begins official workouts. Martz wants Harrington to get a head start on the new offensive system. Surely there must be some similarities to the previous West Coast system, right? "None," says Martz. "We're going to coach him like he's in high school." Sounds like fun. Harrington gets one more chance to prove he's the man. Can he come through?

The Big Board

There are already two teams in the fantasy baseball league, so it's time to drum up some more interest. You can see Brandon Funston's Big(ger) board here, a list of his top 100 fantasy baseball players. A preview:

1. Alex Rodriguez
2. Albert Pujols
3. Vladimir Guerrero

You can sign-up here.

Camaro Concept

Did you see Chevy's Camaro concept at the auto show last month? It looks like this:


You can see more on Chevy's official site. Bad news is that because no one in Detroit has any money so it won't be produced for quite a while.

Noah's a pussy

Come on Noah, come get me. I'm hiding in cyberspace. I can say anything I want. Na na na-boo boo.

More on Noah

This guy's a real celebrity! There was an article about him in a Naval Academy publication, which you can check out here.

Disturbing

Now that I'm something like a real engineer, a somewhat troubling thought has occurred to me. All the structures and devices our lifestyles and lives depend on are engineered. At some point in a project, every engineer has to make assumptions and says "Boy, I hope this works." or "I hope this doesn't blow up and kill everyone." These assumptions have varying degrees of validity. I'm becoming familiar with the WAG (wild ass guess). We actually use that as a note on calculating. Sometimes, you have to WAG like a golden retriever on prozac.

Who's surprised?

Noah Gould won the US open Karate tournament last weekend. I'm a bit short on details, but I'm told he won his weight class (Heavy), then beat the other champions to take the whole thing. For those who don't know, Noah made black belt before thanksgiving, having only started his freshman year (he's now a senior). That's fast (normally takes 5+ years).

Quantum Physicists just want to see if we'll actually believe it

"A non-running computer produces fewer errors," Yeah, obvious. The trick is getting answers out of it. They claim they can. Quantum physics, like the duck-billed platypus, is indisputable evidence the God does, in fact, have a sense of humor. And its really weird.

Ready for the draft?

No? Well I'm not quite yet there either, but as the Combine begins today it's time to start talking about it. To warm you up, check out this mock draft from Charles Robinson.

And the starter is...

Joey Harrington. Well, not officially of course. But sort of. The new Detroit coaching staff threw their support behind Harrington yesterday, meaning he will most likely stay in Detroit and they will not use their 1st round draft pick on a QB. The thought is that Martz can work his magic on Harrington and turn him into a Pro Bowl player. Well, maybe just a serviceable starter. Can we get Dre' Bly's opinion on this?

Ill-tempered Rodent

By now, you've probably heard about the altercation between an MSU student and a UM basketball player before the game on Saturday. You may have even seen video on ESPN. Now I don't think Mr. Brock should have been down on the court, which is a violation of the contract for his Izzone tickets, and especially shouldn't have been there drunk. But even so, Ba doesn't get a free pass. Brock could have been seriously injured and Ba had plenty of opportunities to get away from the situation. He looks like he was just trying to prove how tough he was. It's a good thing the stands were empty, because if the Izzone had a legitimate reason to attack a UM player they'd still be scrubbing him out of the concrete. UM guard Daniel Horton said: "We did everything we could to try and prevent it." Well, if "everything" means "nothing", then I'm sure that's an accurate statement. In the end both universities come up looking bad. Good job guys.

Deep Philosophy

Q. What did the Zen Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
A. "Make me one with everything."

On presenting a $10 bill to the vendor, He asked for his change...the vendor replied "But change comes from within."

Detroit Sports Round-Up

A few interesting stories from the past week in Detroit sports:

-Here's an article about the future of Lions, and another more specifically about Harrington and Martz.

-A note here about how Milicic has no one to blame but himself for his lack of development.

-A story about how Flip Saunders plans to play all four All-Star Pistons at once and how team play might be coming to the NBA. Also has a picture of the AWFUL all-star uniforms. Yuck!

Irked

I haven't posted for a while, mostly because the sports world is largely focused on the Olympics, which I care nothing about. But I finally found something annoying enough to get me to post. It's right here. I know what you're thinking: "But that's only ESPN's NFL front page." Yup. And it annoys me. I'm not even talking about layout or intrusive video and ads. It's the Insider content that bugs me. ESPN has been pushing this paid content for many years, but I think it's gotten worse over the past year or so. It's especially noticeable during the NFL offseason where there's almost nothing you can read for free. It seems to be an attitude ESPN has, and it really irks me. They may be the the "worldwide leader is sports", but there are many other acceptable substitutes online. And if you start talking about fantasy sports, ESPN massive failure with free fantasy football last season put them far down the list. Anyway, I think I'm going to start checking Foxsports.com for my sports news first.

We don't need to stinkin' recoil operated autoloading mechanisms

Go watch this video. In-freakin-sane. Thankfully they run it at one half speed the second time. I can't imagine firing a revolver that fast, much less hitting anything.

Holy Terror, Batman!

Batman takes on Al-Queda! No, really. Frank Miller is half way through a new graphic novel were Batman defends Gotham from terrorists. Real world, arab, muslim terrorists. No swapping for neo-nazis or crazy Christians. Hearkens back to the days of Captain America and Superman pounding Hitler. I'll buy that.

I like to show off

In case anyone is interested, (or not, I'm going to post regardless), here is my new car.
2005 Grand Prix GT. Has a few options on it, didn't spring for the GTP with the supercharger, but it makes for a nice drive regardless.

Custom Candy Hearts

Valentine's Day is getting nearer and many people are looking for candy that expresses how they feel about a special person. Well, this site lets you put exactly what you're feeling on a candy heart. As you can see, I made one for Matt. Okay, so this site only makes a picture of a candy heart. Go here if you actually want custom candy hearts.

CC Ringtone

I was looking online at ringtones for my phone, thinking maybe I'd set up unique ringtones for each group (I can only do groups, not individuals). I was trying to figure out what song to use for the CC ringtone when I thought: "Why don't I let people vote?" So, what do you think? Here are a couple examples:

1. CC Fight Song (Northwestern Fight Song)
2. Enter Sandman Intro: Metallica
3. Thunderstruck: AC/DC
4. Good Riddance (Time of Your Life): Green Day
5. Brain Stew: Green Day
6. Dachshund "Weiner Dog" Barking (Okay, that one's just for Kevin)
7. 3am: Matchbox 20 (For Fritz, really)
8. My Hero: Foo Fighters
9. Brass Monkey: Beastie Boys (for Aaron)
10. Phenomenon: Thousand Foot Krutch
11. Chem 6A: Switchfoot
12. Hands and Feet: Audio Adrenaline

Okay, that's more than enough, I'm sure you get the idea. You can see the actual site here. In case you're wondering, I currently have Crazy Train by Ozzy, The Clincher by Chevelle, and the "Eat 'em Up" MSU cheer.

Finally

The Raiders have finally hired a new head coach, or rather an old one, Art Shell. They are the last NFL team to fill their head coaching vacancy. Two questions this brings to mind:

1. Does this mean we won't hear any more in the offseason about how awful NFL teams are because there aren't enough black coaches? Is 2/10 enough for the offseason? If not, how many? And aren't you then just asking for a quota?

2. How unappealing are the Raiders? I mean two of the guys that they interviewed elected to work for the Lions instead as either head coach or coordinator. The Lions. They would rather work for the Fords than for Al Davis. Makes you wonder.

Right On

You are so right about ESPN and women's basketball. Personally, I'm tired of ESPN telling me how I should follow and care about the sport. I imagine this has something to do with ESPN carrying the women's tourney. But, no matter how many times you talk about UConn and the Vols, or ask if Pat Summit is a better coach than Coach K, I just don't care. Even when I was on campus and the women's team was making a run at the title, I didn't care. I don't follow women's basketball, golf, tennis, or soccer. No matter how many stories ESPN features. Heck, I barely follow the men's games in those sports.

You know what else I don't care about, no matter how many times the TV says it's important? The Olympics. I'm fairly patriotic, but I refuse to watch a sport I wouldn't watch otherwise just because it's the Olympics. So maybe I'll pay attention to the hockey. Oh, by the way, figure skating is not a sport. Out.

ESPNEWS Headline?

This was the "headline" on the right side of ESPN's webpage. Click here for the "story." The title of the link in the "headlines" column said "No. 6 Maryland stuns No. 1 UNC women at home." Let me breakdown the sportgrammatical errors:

1. Nothing in womens basketball is considered "stunning." No one cares.
2. Nothing in womens basketball is worthy of being a "headline" in the "headlines" column. Again, no one cares.
3. Nobody even knew UNC was No. 1, let alone Maryland even had a womens basketball team.
4. In womens basketball, it doesn't matter where they played. Home...away...no one goes to the game regardless of where it is played. So, since that eliminates "the 6th man" advantage or home court advantage, there is no need to spice up the headline stating they lost a home game.
5. The fact that the link title didn't even say what sport it was, just saying "women" in the sentence immediately pointed to women's college basketball. If it was a men's headline, it would just say No. 6 John Doe stuns No. 1 UConn at home. We all know the sport. (Notice it is called NCAA and WNCAA on the bottom ticker?)

How Much Better?

Now that the Lions have hired Martz, the question is how big an impact will he have on the team? Of course with an all-new coaching staff it might be difficult to break out his individual contributions, but you can boil it down to this: What do you expect out of the Lions next year? On PTI, Kornheiser and Wilbon gave the Lions a 65% and 75% chance, respectively, of reaching the playoffs. Now any Lions fan will know how dangerous it is to be too optimistic, but this is coming from neutral observers. Could it be realistic? Well, no. Am I wrong?

Thank God It's Thursday, Again

According to ESPN and the Detroit Lions website, Mike Martz has been hired as offensive coordinator of the Detroit Lions. Did I just step into a time warp back to last Thursday? Apparently, somebody decided the deal needed to get done. I may have to take back some of the nasty things I said about Detroit management. Some. Maybe.

New MNF Team

You probably already know that Monday Night Football is moving to ESPN next season. What you didn't know is that the broadcast team will be all new, which ESPN announced today. Well, re-announced, since they'd already announced it after it was decided to move MNF to ESPN. Apparently Al Michaels had a change of heart, necessitating a larger change than was originally planned. The new team will be Mike Tirico as the play-by-play man with Joe Theismann and Tony Kornheiser providing color. Michelle Tafoya and Suzy Kolber will be on the sidelines, as they were at Super Bowel XL. I'm going to miss the Sunday Night crew of Mike Patrick, Theismann, and Paul Maguire, who I thought should have just been moved to MNF. They were one of my favorite broadcast crews ever, though I know they had their detractors. Those people suck. Patrick is a better play-by-play guy than Tirico, Theismann stays, leaving Tony as the wild card. I love PTI, which will be on the road with the crew for every MNF game, but I don't know how well Kornheiser can do color commentary. PTI works because of the interaction of Kornheiser and Wilbon, alone either of them might be good but not great. And, as Kornheiser said, speaking as Howard Cosell, people are going to throw bricks at their TVs so they don't have to see his ugly mug in HD. If nothing else, Best Buy will end up happy.

Fantasy Baseball

The league is up. The email from Yahoo:

Welcome to Yahoo! Sports Fantasy Baseball.

This is to confirm that you've created the Custom League named Cass City Monkies.

To allow other managers to join your league, send them the League ID# and Password. In your case, the ID# is 23429 and the Password is monkie.

You have chosen for your league to take part in a live online draft on Tue Mar 28 5:00pm PST. Until that time, you (and only you) can change the type of draft by using the Change Draft Type option found among your Commissioner Tools, which can be reached from your League Overview page.

If you choose to remain in a live draft, please arrive at the draft 10 minutes ahead of the scheduled time. The draft will start promptly and may conclude rapidly if only a few managers are logged in.

We also suggest that all league members pre-rank their players in case a manager can't make it to the draft. Managers can do this at any time by simply going to the Fantasy Baseball home page and clicking on their team name.

Thanks for joining. Good luck.

--Fantasy Baseball Commissioner
http://baseball.fantasysports.yahoo.com/b1

Join if you're interested.

XL Thoughts

Some thoughts on the Super Bowl:

1. The officiating was pretty terrible, and all the calls went against Seattle. They blew too many opportunities to blame the loss on the calls, but it's enough to make you wonder.

2. What a great ending for Jerome Bettis, the best anyone could hope for. However, I don't think he's near as beloved in Detroit as the media says.

3. Joey Porter was shut down in the Super Bowl. That's satisfying.

4. Jerramy Stevens caught a TD pass, but also dropped 3 passes and was benched in the game. That's exactly how he played all season: making just enough plays to tease you into thinking he was going to break out.

5. The pass where Roethlisberger scrambled to avoid tacklers, check to be sure he was behind the line of scrimmage, and then threw the ball down to the 1 was a defining play for him. He played poorly overall, but that was a great play.

6. I love Randle El on trick plays. Absolutely one of my favorite things in the NFL to watch.

And the winner is...

Craig Emmert. After 4+ hours of Tecmo strategy, fun, throwing of controllers, food and really bad weather, Craig made it through the Tecmo Madness.

A few stats:
There were 15 people in the tourney, ages ranging from 9 to 33?

When each person arrived, they took a number (seed) out of the cool whip dish. Yes, the cool whip was all gone. So, 15 people meant one person got the bye...Craig.

For the night, Craig only had to play 4 games to take home the Championship trophy...Bobblehead. Craig finished 4-0.

On the other hand, Brad Speirs, 2nd place, had to play 8 games before he lost in the championship.

Host Nathan Haag, 4th place, had to play 6 games. He was knocked out by Brad Speirs:
49ers: 24
Oilers: 21

Biggest upset(s): 16th seed and 9 year old Tyler Brandel knocked off the #1 seed after coming back from being down two TD's. Tyler was the Giants. Following the win, Tyler then knocked off Nathan Haag, 22-21 on a 30-yard FG to win the game as time expired. By the way, Tyler made the Giants look like the 49ers passing offense:
Giants: 22
Bengals: 21

Other notables: Jason Pierce, O-G football coach, 3rd place.
Nathan Fritz: 1-2
Aaron Barrigar and Kevin Schott: 0-2

Teams used the most: 49ers, Oilers, Chiefs, Eagles/Giants/Bengals.
Yes, someone used the Lions. That's right, the Chiefs. In fact, the Chiefs were involved in the first 4 games played. I think the Chiefs were 0-4. I can't remember, they might have gotten a win.

I told Fritz on Wednesday I'd be happy if I finished in the top 5. However, the next night I "scrimmaged" Jason Pierce 4 times and won all 4 games, 3 of them using the 2nd player controller. Prior to that point, I had never beaten Jason and he was my pre-tournament pick to win it all. Side note, back at Christmas break, Jason whooped me 3 games in a row. So, after beating Jason Thursday night 4-0, I thought I had a better chance than Top 5 finish.

So yes, the 9-year old, comes to my house and beats me. Shows up the host. Now that just isn't Tecmo etiquette. However, in hind sight, it was the best thing that could happen. Tyler then had to play Jason Pierce (loss #1) then played Brad Spiers (loss #2). So, had I beat Tyler, I would probably been finished by Jason and Brad as well.

My biased opinion: This tourament was sweet. We even had a guy bring his own pool stick...check that, sticks. A "breaking" stick and the "regular" stick. He plays in a Bay City pool league, so he's pretty good. I didn't get to see him play though, too busy making sure the Tourney finished by 1 a.m. You know how in March madness every 5 minutes there is a game just about to end and it comes down to the wire or has an incredible finish? And then the TV station breaks into the next game about to finish, and then when that game finishes there is another game ready to end with both teams close? Are you picturing it? Like at a sports bar/restaurant, there are 4 tv's with a different NCAA game on each one so you can see all of them have great finishes? Well, that is exactly what the Tecmo Tourney was like. We had 3 rooms with a TV in each room with a Tecmo game being played. Even better was the fact all the games were staggered, so you could go into each room and see them all end individually. You never had to miss a finish. Every time you went into a room another game was coming down to a tight finish. And then boom, go into the next room for another one. Incredible!

See you in 2007!

Mike Martz

According to Ryan King on Saturday night..."they'll get him." Referring to the fact that the deal with the Lions didn't work out, but he will end up signing.

Nice Job

Mike Martz was ready to become the Detroit Lions offensive coordinator. The only hurdle remaining was to get a contract put together and signed. So what did the Lions front office do? They botched it, of course. They probably were unwilling to pay the money Martz wanted, reportedly an average of $1.5 million over 3 years. The possibility of Martz becoming the OC actually had me somewhat excited about the Lions again. Sure, he's nuts, but he's also an offensive genius, and it seemed like Marinelli would be able to keep him in line. Now it's much less likely that Martz will join the team. I may have to go find myself a "Fire Millen" t-shirt.

UPDATE: It's official, Martz has turned down the job. The money was the problem. I think the Lions had a real chance to change the franchise right here, and they blew it. They thought they had the right guy, but let a relatively small amount of money kill the deal. There's a reason they've been mediocre for 50 years.

Fly, Little Birdy, Fly!

I knew cattle could catch some major air when they wanted to, but apparently the bullfight fans in Mexico didn't, judging by this video. "Little Birdy" leapt over the wall and into the stands where he gored at least one woman and injured others. Those skills would be appreciated in a rodeo, but not in the bullfighting world: a fight participant went into the stands and killed LB with his sword. The show resumed half an hour later.

The List - "Haag's 13"???

"You're either in or you're out, right now."

Those were the words that should have been on the invitation to the 2006 Tecmo Super Bowl (TSB) Tourney. Wow! I realized I might need to use two Nintendo's, but am I going to have to have the tourney at two site locations? This many people in one house...one living room...one bedroom? I guess we will have to use 3 bedrooms with 3 nintendo's and, oh yeah, 3 tecmo games. The rooms I have. I'm lacking one Nintendo and one game. Without further ado, here is the up-to-the-minute list, as of 12:05 am:

1. Craig Emmert - first one in
2. Nathan Fritz
3. Ryan King - my girlfriends brother
4. Tyler Brandel - 9 years old
5. Kevin Schott
6. Aaron Barrigar
7. Rick Parrott
8. Brad Speirs - Jason's brother
9. Jason Speirs - Brad's brother
10. Jason Pierce - The Las Vegas favorite (whooped me 3 times over Christmas break)
11. Derek Dodge - I'll explain later
12. The Host

Matt Ross - no word yet. Left a message on his cell at 10 pm Jan. 30.
John D'Arcy - "No." Rumor has it, he says "I don't think I can play." If I put the pressure on him that we already have 12 playing, I can hopefully put the guilt trip on him.

I wouldn't be surprised if we have 14 in the tourney.

Oh, Derek Dodge. Think back with me. Back. No, way back. Further yet. Senior year. 1999. Mrs. Tuckey's government class. Second hour. No, not Nicolette, Katie, Marissa, Mandy Board, etc. And no, not Sarah with her missing toes that Steve made fun of. There was a short time period that Derek Dodge came into Mrs. Tuckey's class for about 1-2 weeks where he did some history/government/supreme court stuff. I am inviting him because I attend the New Creation Community Church in Caro in order to play on their basketball and volleyball team. Derek goes to the church and plays on one of the volleyball teams. He played last year and so I've known him for a year now. I asked him since he is 28 if he remembers Tecmo Super Bowl. He claimed he was pretty good, so I figured he'd be good for an invite. Well, last week I started putting things together: he teaches in Caro, in the high school, in the histroy/social studies field..."So that's who you are. You were at Cass City when I was a senior." (How do I really remember? It's because I was a jerk when he came and was rude one day and apologized to Mrs. Tuckey.) So, do I expect anyone else to remember him...Nope.

Back to the Tourney. I'm glad I'm an experienced hand at filling out brackets. If we have 12 players, that requires 23 games for a champion. If we have 14 like I'm now shooting for, that would be 27 games. If we start at 7pm, use 3 tv's, play 9 games in one hour (1 game = 20 min...3 games at one time...3 x 3 = 9 games in one hour), we should have a champion in 3 hours (27 games divided by 9 gpr [games per hour] = 3 hours).

I guess it's safe to say...there are some fans of Tecmo Super Bowl.

Highly Recommended: Ong-Bak

I recently restarted my Netflix membership. It's a pretty cheap way to be able to see lots of movies, especially ones that you couldn't find at you local video store. I had remembered reading somewhere, and hearing from my brother, that Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior (trailer here) might be a pretty decent martial arts film, so I put it in my queue. I watched it this weekend. Then I watched it again. The martial arts action is breathtaking. I don't think I've ever seen such an impressive display of physical prowess. Tony Jaa is, quite simply, the man. I guarantee you've never seen anything like it. First, you've probably never seen the martial art of Muay Thai, which looks much different than what you've seen in Matrix clones. It's fast and brutal. Second, as the advertising is fond of pointing out, there are no wires and no CG. This is amazing stuff. Check it out.

Shark Vs. Octopus

Have you ever wondered what a fight between a shark and an octopus would look like? Of course you have. You can see one here. That's one creepy octopus.

Happy Winter-een-mas!

Winter-een-mas starts today and runs through the 31st. Don't know what WEMas is? Get the explanation here. Basically, it's a week to celebrate video games. So now you have an excuse to play. Play an extra game for me as I'll be out of town and away from any video game system until Friday.

Fantasy Baseball '06

Does anyone want to play this year? I know the enthusiasm the past two years for the game has been a little low. Sign-up on Yahoo will start in early February, so sometime within the next 3 weeks or so. If we have enough guys, is there anything we want to do different? A prize or trophy? Rules changes? Feedback would be appreciated.

Detroit Baseball Photos

A picture is worth a thousand words. So, if you want to see thousands of words worth of Detroit baseball history, check out these galleries at the Detroit News web site. They've got photos like this one of Kirk Gibson:


Or this one featuring player-manager Mickey Cochrane and the Babe:


You can also purchase these photos. A 5x7 will run you $12, an 8x10 $30, and, if you've got lots of room, you can get a 20x30 for $90.

This Time

The Lions ended their search for a coach today, and maybe this time things will work out better. Millen has chosen Rod Marinelli who was the Tampa Bay defensive line and assistant head coach. I can't say I'm terribly excited, but there's not a hire I can think of that would have excited me. Apparently he is expected to be a tough, disciplined coach, as you would expect from a DL guy and a Vietnam veteran. My favorite quote from the press conference:

There’s skill in hitting (in football); how to bend your knees, hand placement, blocking, footwork, all those things. And you have to play this game low to be good. It’s a low man’s game. It’s a game of hips when you tackle, not push and shove. When you’re standing up all the time, you lose that leverage and you lose that toughness in terms of running the game. That’s how I’m going to sell it because I have to explain to them that this is why I’m doing this. This is what I believe and I’ve been successful at it. I’ll put the film on for you. That’s all I can do. You will be great football players when you work and you believe in the pad level and those things. Is it always fun? No, but winning is. It’s not like I am taking these guys to Junction City and getting after them (laughter). I just believe in skill, the development of skill. You have to be hard, and along with being hard is being smart, and I am that.

I can get behind a coach that says "it's a low man's game." Can the Lions?

UPDATE: Here's Albom's take on the new guy.

This Is A Heart Attack

You know how you've watched your team make a critical mistake in a game and thought you were going to have a heart attack? This guy knows the feeling. For real. He had a heart attack right after Jerome Bettis fumbled in the game versus the Colts. He's in the hospital recovering, saying: "The Steelers won the game and I'm still alive, so I guess I'm doing pretty good."

A Tecmo tourney, coming to you

Adam, I was checking out some Tecmo Super Bowl websites and next weekend is a TSB tourney in North Branch...Minnesota! Check it out here. Good luck.

Detroit Sports Legends

Who are they? I'm curious as to what other people's opinions are. I'm thinking of just guys who played for Detroit teams, though Michigan sports legends is another interesting question. What do you think a guy has to do to deserve the title? A championship would be a place to start, but you obviously can't leave a guy like Barry off the list. And not every notable player on a championship team would really qualify. Guys who I think probably qualify, not an exhaustive list and in no particular order:

Modern
1. Barry Sanders
2. Steve Yzerman
3. Brendan Shanahan
4. Isiah Thomas
5. Joe Dumars
6. Alan Trammell
7. Kirk Gibson
8. Lou Whitaker
9. Ben Wallace (Might not be there yet.)

Old School
1. Tigers Hall of Famers: Ty Cobb, Al Kaline, Sparky Anderson, etc.
2. Gordie Howe

What do you think? I'm sure I missed people. Are all those guys deserving, or are some of them only great because they helped win a championship?

Are You Ready For Some...Baseball?

It's that time of year again. MLB has released the 2006 baseball schedule and our favorite weekend is perfect for a Twins - World Series Champion White Sox showdown August 18, 19 and 20. You can check out the Twins' schedule in August back a few words ago in this sentence. I'm in favor of the Friday 7:10 pm game. Any objections from you, Matt?

QB Decisions

Scout.com has this article up about choices facing the Lions at QB. It mentions 3 other potential QBs if Joey is sent packing: Billy Volek, David Garrard (who I've mentioned here), and Josh McCown. Assuming Harrington is done with the Lions, I'm a big fan of acquiring Volek or Garrard. They are certainly at the top of the list looking for a potential breakout player at the position. Apparently the Lions have expressed interest in Volek. Let's hope they can make a good move.

Club Foot

You've probably heard this song by Kasabian even if you didn't realize it. It's been showing up in commercials and TV bumpers lately due to an insanely catchy riff. I first noticed it in the trailer for Serenity. Anyway, I've found two places to download it: here at Insound for a 160 kbps mp3 of the album version or a 192 kbps mp3 live version here at the band's website (there's a little language at the beginning of the live version). I prefer the crunchier live version myself.

Instant Replay

I'm watchng the Giants-Panthers game and I'm thinking just how superior the Big Ten's replay system is to the NFL's. Jeremy Shockey caught a pass and as he was tackled the ball came out. Carolina recovered. The live view on the TV made it look like he was down, but replay showed the ball was clearly ripped out before he was down. After conferring for a while, the refs ruled down by contact. This meant it could not be challenged. Luckily, the Giants punted on the drive and it made no difference. In the Big Ten this would have been automatically reviewed and the Panthers would have had the ball, significantly changing the momentum of the game. Now the bowl season showed us that a replay system is only as good as the people running it, or in the case of the national championship game of how well the equipment is working, but it seems unfathomable to me that the NFL leaves such uncertainty in the playoffs.

It Begins

It's the time of the year when rumors about the NFL draft start circulating. They're already starting, as this report from Chris Mortensen of ESPN shows. Apparently, the Texans will take Reggie Bush with the 1st pick, even if Vince Young enters. This would leave Leinart and Young to likely be selected by the Saints and Titans. The highest profile picks would be gone before #5.

What does this mean for the Lions? Well, if you're hoping the team will snag Young or Leinaet, you're likely to be disappointed unless they make a monster move up. It also means that Titans' backup Billy Volek might be available. With the Lions likey to need multiple QBs, I think picking up an experienced backup who may have the talent to be a starter would be a great idea. So, don't expect to see it happen.

Wallpaper 1-7-06

This week's wallpaper: Cable, Deadpool, Luke Cage, and Iron Fist.

Munich

I haven't seen Spielberg's newest movie, and I don't intend to. However, I've read a lot about it. Mona Charen sums up everything I've thought regarding the movie, and then some. She also does it much better than I ever could have. A quote:

During the opening credits, the audience is informed that the film is “inspired by real events.” That could mean anything — but movie audiences probably will not parse the words with lawyerly care. They will read it in the context of a film that offers generous servings of verisimilitude.

Check it out if you're interested.

Futurama Returns?

Good news, everyone! This report at Variety claims that Futurama may be making a return to television after its last new episode aired in August '03. This is being fueled by DVD sales and ratings on Cartoon Network, same as happened to the Family Guy. Also, the show is awesome. It was created by Matt Groening who you obviously recognize from The Simpsons. But Futurama is better than either of those other shows. There are many reasons for this, but the most obvious is Bender, a "foul-mouthed, drinking, smoking, shoplifting, misanthropic robot." In honor of this news, let's sing the "Bender is Great Song": "I'm so great. Great, great, great. Bender is great. Great, great..."

Team 88

Steelers star and ABC sideline reporter Lynn Swann had declared that he is running for governor of Pennsylvania. He would be the first black governor of Pennsylvania if he was to win. He will be seeking the Republican nomination for governor, so expect many to accuse Swann of not being really black. This would be his first time running for public office. It will be interesting to see how his campaign plays out. You can check out the campaign site here.

In-Vince-ible

You know, I really hated that title when I saw others use it going into the Rose Bowl last night. But it was appropriate as Vince Young was the brightest star in Texas's 41-38 victory over defending champ USC, piling up 467 yds of total offense. My thoughts:

1. It's a shame that whenever I think about this great game, the first thing I'll remember is poor officiating. I expect better from a Big Ten crew. The call on Young's pitch that resulted in a TD was clearly wrong, his knee was obviously down. USA Today reports that a monitor malfunction stopped the officials from reviewing the play. In that game, you find a way to make the right call, whatever it takes. It's inexcusable to do otherwise. In the fourth quarter Keith Jackson pointed out that the clock ran after a pass was caught and taken out of bounds. By my count 27 seconds ran off the clock (I recorded the game on my computer). Do you think USC would have liked 27 more seconds in that game? USC can't blame the loss on these mistakes as they made far too many themselves, but they certainly leave a bad taste in my mouth.

2. USC was arrogant. They played the whole first half and much of the second as if they didn't really believe they could be beaten. They should have kicked the FG in the first half; I think the 4th and 2 call in the 4th quarter was wrong but at least defensible. Reggie Bush made possibly the most boneheaded play I've ever seen when he tried to pitch it. I wouldn't even to that on NCAA Football, unless it was by accident. USC also showed why they needed so many comeback wins this year: the defense was very average. That was one of the most horrendous displays of tackling in a championship game ever. Do you really think you can arm tackle Vince Young?

3. I was not a believer in Vince Young. I'm not ready to vote him into the NFL Hall of Fame as Mack Brown was, but I'll admit he might be able to get there. I don't think I've ever seen a player dominate a game the way he did last night. He was unstoppable. If I was selecting a franchise quarterback in the draft I'd probably still pick Leinart, but now I wouldn't be disappointed to see my team select Young.

4. Memo those talking about trading all your picks to get Reggie Bush: he's just a man. He might be a great player, but "transcendant"? I think not.

5. I don't think this is the end of USC and the rise of a Texas dynasty. There's just too much parity in college football for another team to dominate as happened in the '50s and '60s. I don't think we'll even see a repeat champion in the next 5 years.

6. Did the game live up to the hype? My first impression was no, it was too sloppy and I thought many of the mistakes took away from the great performances. But many others are saying it was as good as the hype. I'll have to think about it more.

If you missed any of the BCS games, you can catch them this weekend on ESPN Classic.

Careful

You see, we're on the internet, and although I only expect a small handful of people to read this blog, others do happen across it from time to time. Searches on blogger for news can lead you here pretty easily. So others are watching. Might be a good thing to remember.

Who is Cosmorok?

Some guy named "Grant" with blog name "Cosmorok" commented on your Pistons report. Who is he and where did he come from?

Also, great job jinxing the Pistons so they could lose to the Cavs. (I expected them to lose that game anyway. After rolling by the Spurs and Heat, they are bound to lose a tough road game eventually.)

The "Spread"

When you listen to college football commentators, do you ever get the feeling that they have no idea what a "spread" offense really is? They often talk as if Texas Tech, Michigan State, Ohio State, and West Virginia all use the same playbook. They seem to think of it as some sort of pass-happy offense that runs the option fairly often. In reality, all "spread" signifies is that the offense spreads the field horizontally so they can stretch the field vertically. It's a philosophy that can be implemented many different ways. Saying a spread offense is run by a team gives you some idea of the plays they run, but if you want to accurately describe the offense there's much more to be said. I wish commentators would understand this.

Also, I've noticed a side effect of playing many hours of NCAA football: you recognize every team's fight song. I don't mean just Notre Dame and Ohio State, those are obvious for a Spartan fan. I mean Georgia, West Virginia, Texas Tech, Alabama, etc. I'm not sure if it's a blessing or a curse.

Looking for a Job?

Well, there's a few vacancies in the NFL. There are now 7 coaching vacancies. That's right, we're approaching a 25% turnover rate for NFL coaches. You can check out the list here.

More Innovation from Ford

Ford has been advertising the Ford Fusion as "more innovation from Ford." Here's a pic:


Gosh, that front end looks familiar. Where have I seen it before? Oh, yeah:


They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. One thing it is certainly not, however, is innovation.

Unofficial Top 20 Draft Order

From Scout.com, the unofficial top 20 draft order for the 2006 NFL draft:

1 Houston 2-14 0
2 New Orleans 3-13
3 Tennessee 4-12
4 N.Y. Jets 4 12
5 Green Bay 4 12
6 San Francisco 4 12
7 Oakland 4 12
8 Buffalo 5 11
9 Detroit 5 11
10 Arizona 5 11
11 St. Louis 5 10
12 Cleveland 6 10
13 Baltimore 6 10
14 Philadelphia 6 10
15 Atlanta 8 8
16 Miami 9 7
17 Minnesota 9 7
18 San Diego 9 7
19 Dallas 9 6
20 Kansas City 10 6

Wallpaper 1-2-06

I thought I'd start a semi-regular feature: my current wallpaper. Today is Daredevil and Luke Cage.

NFL Roundup

The NFL began the new year by wrapping up the season with a slate of largely meaningless games. Some were memorable. Jake Delhomme got cheeky. Doug Flutie converted the first drop kick since 1941. The Texans secured the 1st pick in the 2006 draft. Shaun Alexander set the season touchdown record at 28. And the Lions lost.

You can see the final standings here. I don't have the team strength of schedules, so I can only tell you the first five picks in the draft: Texans, Saints, Titans, Jets, and Packers. The Lions will be somewhere between 8 and 10.

As for the Lions, you can read Mike O'Hara's breakdown of the team going into the offseason here. The short version: there's a lot of work to do.