Monorail!

I didn't watch the State of the Union address last night, but I read it went something like this:

Quote of the Day

Enough radioactivity was released to create 17 Hulks and a Spider-Man. Here is an artist's conception:

Quite disturbing.

-Kent Brockman, The Simpsons, "To Surveil, With Love"

Forty rods to the hogshead.

I was watching an episode of The Simpsons, "A Star Is Burns" this evening and came across two of my favorite quotes from the entire series. The first:

Abe: The metric system is the tool of the devil! My car gets forty rods to the hogshead and that's the way I likes it.

And the second:

Burns: Get me Steven Spielberg!
Smithers: He's unavailable.
Burns: Then get me his non-union Mexican equivalent!

Simpsonized

This site had me clicking for at least an hour. It features pop culture characters drawn in the Simpsons animated style, like so:


Much more at the link.

Monorail!

After President Obama's remarks about high-speed rail, I think this is necessary:

Vows

I don't know if Andy is writing his own vows, but are some ideas from The Simpsons episode "A Milhouse Divided":

"I will now read these special vows which Homer has prepared for this occasion. 'Do you, Marge, take Homer, in richness and in poorness' -- poorness is underlined -- 'in impotence and in potence, in quiet solitude or blasting across the alkali flats in a jet-powered, monkey-navigated'... [consults the notecards] ... and it goes on like this."
-Rev. Lovejoy

I think the "quiet solitude or etc." line would make for a memorable ceremony.

It's On!

The world puts up with a lot of things from communist (or wannabe communist) dictators like Hugo Chavez: nationalizing industries, torturing dissidents, etc. But banning The Simpsons? Enough playing around, let's just nuke the bastard.

Simpsonize

Ever wonder what you'd look like as a character from The Simpsons (or Futurama)? No? Oh well, move along then. But if you, check out this site. As you can see from my picture, it's not dead on, but it does sort of bear a resemblance. It's a good way to kill a few minutes. Enjoy.

"Mattingly, I told you to shave those sideburns."

With "The Simpsons" coming to theaters this weekend ESPN's Page 2 has a great article by Jim Caple about baseball-themed episodes of the long-running show. That only leaves one thing to say: "Do you want to know the terrifying truth, or do you want to see me sock a few dingers?"

"Dingers! Dingers!"

400

Wow, that was the 400th episode of the Simpsons? Hard to believe that it's been on that long. Also hard to believe that crap like that actually passes for a Simpsons episode. This season has been pretty decent overall, but this was a huge disappointment for a fan expecting something special for number 400. And could someone explain how two different episodes aired consecutively make for a "one-hour special event"?

Worst. Episode. Ever.

"G.I. (Annoyed Grunt)" was the worst episode of the Simpsons ever.